Grief
by Iresol
Summary: Ok, this is way after the BHD movie and involves Sanderson and Hoot's Widow. I moved it from Reality to its own fic, so read Reality first for timeline wise.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note, Ok read the first chapter for Reality, or you might get confused time wise. This takes place way after the BHD movie. Read before you scold me.

Sanderson walked up the snowy drive.

The first time he had been home since he lost his wife, the first time he had been home since he lost his best friend in Iraq.

Next door his sister lived in the small brick house with her daughter and husband when he was home.

What seemed like a lifetime ago he had lived on the same base, in the same country, but it had been happier then. There had been drives down to the Rhine, cold weather training, but times changed.

He came to the front door and reached out for the knob, his wedding band still on his finger glittered in the moon.

For the life of him he couldn't take it off. He couldn't stop thinking about her, how it would have been different if he had been home. The Army gave him time off, but he would never be the same.

Never again would he ever look at his daughter and not see his late wife, or listen to his son telling his sister stories and not think of his late wife. Never again would he ever have another drink, never another beer, or even champagne. He'd never tolerate another drunk person as long as he lived.

With a silent prayer he opened the door, duffel bag in hand.

The small house was a disaster.

It had been hard to keep a small Army base house clean with two kids, but four under the same roof was impossible.

He stepped inside the warm house and found a safe secure feeling. Silence filled the house. No screaming or children's voices. The walls were covered with framed pictures and school pictures, even a house colored on the wall with crayon.

He made sure not to track any salt or snow inside, just as a very pregnant Diana came down the steps, tube of chocolate chip cookie dough in her hand.

Eight and a half months pregnant with what would have been his best friends first son.

Her husband and his wife had died within hours of one another.

Still on her hand was her wedding band.

Once he came home for both funerals they decided it would be better if she took care of all four kids, after all she had been there for their whole lives. Sanderson didn't want his children going home to Maine, or the Middle East where their other grandparents were. Besides, Diana now a widow and orphan, needed help as much as he did.

It was not a sexual relationship, but a friendship.

They had leaned on one another and still did, Sanderson knew if his children weren't in such good hands he would have lost his mind being away at war for so long. But he knew Diana would take care of them. He thanked God the four children cohabited.

"Are they all asleep?" He asked, checking his watch, 2:45.

Diana made it to the bottom step, her free hand on her back, while she chewed on the frozen cookie dough, "They've been asleep. Go kiss your kids good night, then put your laundry in the pantry, and go to bed."

He nodded, then watched as Diana finished up the cookie dough. She asked, "Did you eat?"

Still suffering from airsickness he shook his head, "I'm not hungry."

Diana rolled her eyes, she glanced down at his boots to be sure he didn't track in any mud or dirt. She then told him, "Your room is the bedroom. I moved into the nursery….don't you dare move into the nursery, I can't sleep on anything but my air mattress."

Sanderson nodded, he watched as Diana walked into the kitchen, in what looked like a pair of stolen hospital maternity scrubs, under Hoot's old robe, and fuzzy pink princess slippers. As soon as he heard her washing dishes he climbed the steps.

Exhausted from the plane trip, the time changes, and throwing his guts up he walked down to the master bedroom. He pushed the door open with his foot, he dropped his bag on the floor, almost killing the black cat that had wound its way around his ankles.

It went screaming out of the room.

"Oh, we have a cat," he muttered, then kicked off his shoes and changed his clothes.

**Downstairs** Diana washed up dishes from dinner, put away pots from dinner. She then went in the pantry and unloaded the dryer into a laundry basket and loaded the washer load into the dryer and turned it on. Then she put another load of laundry in the washer. Convinced she did a million loads of laundry a day.

She picked laundry up with her feet, unable to bend over.

Checked the pockets of all the jeans and pants.

Finding change, reports cards, notes from teachers, matchbox cars, rocks, and what looked like spark plugs.

A load thump from behind her made her jump.

Diana glanced over her shoulder and saw a pile of camos and grey clothes under the laundry chute. With a small smile she grabbed all the t-shirts and tossed them in the washer. She grabbed the bottle of Tide, not bothering to measure it out, she poured in what looked like enough, then closed the lid on the washer.

Inside she felt the baby kick her bladder, "Aw shit," she muttered, quickly running out of the pantry for the bathroom.

**Upstairs** Sanderson opened the door to the bedroom, across from the nursery. He slid inside, careful not to trip over any toys that littered the massive room, the room all the Delta's had chipped in to help make when Diana moved on the base with the children. It was two rooms with the walls knocked down. It held two bunks and toys galore.

Three nightlights lite the room enough he didn't trip over any toys and break his neck.

True to her word all four children were sound asleep.

Three girls and a boy.

He walked to the two bunks, one held his son Jordan and his younger sister Alexandria. Both looked like their mother.

He didn't wake them up.

He looked over at Hoot's two daughters, both sound asleep, Robin and Rachael, who was the youngest so far.

Inwardly he thanked God Jordan, Alexandria, and Robin were within a year of each other. Rachael was another story, whether or not they included her in the games she made her way into the game. Even though she was younger by two years she was a model image of her grandfather.

She had been the only child in her Sunday school to use the four-letter "f" word to voice her objection to tropical punch.

**Downstairs** Diana made her way down the hall, kicking the plastic basket of laundry down the hall, unable to bend over and pick it up.

As she made her way past the stairs towards the living room, Sanderson came down the steps and picked it up. She pointed to the living room, "Just go put it on the couch."

He looked at her, watching as she made her way down the hall, he went into the living room. Completely shocked at the sight of a Christmas tree. It took his breath away. On the walls were pictures, holiday decorations, and more crayon drawings. He set the plastic basket full of clean clothes where Diana instructed, then he heard her kicking something else down the halls.

On the floor beside the tree were three backpacks.

Of course there were presents, but they were wrapped tightly with duct tape.

He walked out of the living room, to see Diana coming towards him, kicking a box full of mail. His mail. He couldn't help but laugh at the sight of it, he bent down and picked it up, then looked to Diana, "Go to bed. I'll fold the laundry."

She lifted an eyebrow, but was too tired to argue. She patted his chest, "Aight. Night Sanderson, there are leftovers in the fridge if you change your mind."

He watched Diana waddle toward the steps, then up.

With a sigh he looked down at the mail, on top was a letter from his parents.


	2. Chapter 2

Sanderson sat at the small dining room table, there was no longer a door that cut off the kitchen from the dining room. He didn't ask and he didn't want to know. He sat at the table with Jordan, Alexandria and Robin and tried to go through what was left of his meal.

But he couldn't stop watching his children and Robin.

He couldn't stop watching Alexandria and Robin smile and giggle amongst themselves. As if they were twin sisters. Across the table Jordan sat pouring maple syrup on a spoon and eating it. Until Diana shouted, "Jordan!"

He put the spoon down and held up his plate.

Sanderson was shocked when Diana tossed two cooked waffles in, both hit his plate and landed on the table. Jordan then put them on his plate and shouted, "Thank you Aunty!"

Sanderson watched Diana then continue to empty the dishwasher. She yelled, "Rachael! Get Down Here And Eat!"

Upstairs feet hit the floor and ran across the floor.

Sanderson looked back to a letter from his parents, the last on the stack, but he couldn't open it. He laid it back down and watched his son drown his waffles with syrup. His daughter and Goddaughter whisper about some boy from school. He heard Rachael come down the stairs loudly, then someone knock on the front door.

Rachael was halfway down the steps when someone knocked on the front door. Dressed in her pj's still, her dark hair a mess. She rubbed her eyes and went to the door, she opened it and looked up at two men in uniform.

One she didn't know, the other she did.

Fear filled her. The older brown man had come and told her mom that her dad had been killed. She would remember his face till the day she died. She would remember his voice, even his tears. She would never forget her mother's scream on that night.

Quickly she slammed the door and ran towards the kitchen, Right into her mother as the man knocked again. Diana caught her daughter's arm and softly told her, "Be careful sweetie, go sit down at the table, I put in some waffles for you."

Rachael nodded but watched as her mom walked to the front door with fear.

She saw her mom stiffen as she did that night.

But no scream came, instead her mom let the two men in, she pointed to the living room and called for her uncle, "Sanderson."

A moment or so later he came out of the dining room.

He tousled Rachael's hair and gave her a gentle push towards the dining room. She watched as he walked into the room where her mother had sent the two men. Then she ran to tell her sister.

When Sanderson walked into the toy filled living room with Christmas tree, he froze, Diana headed out of the living room without a word to any of the men. Without offering any of them a drink or anything.

Sanderson crossed his arms, "Captain."

The black man nodded, "Lieutenant. I have a job opportunity for you."

Sanderson's eyebrows rose, the extent of his reaction. Which shocked the other man, a bald Hispanic man who looked at Sanderson as if he were some remarkable specimen.

"What would you say if I told you you have been selected for better paying job? More time at home with your children? Better housing. Less time away and no taxes on your pay?"

Sanderson was immediately suspicious, he chewed on his lower lip, "I'd want to know if I had to sell you my soul."

His Captain laughed, "Hardly."

"Are you talking about a third tour over in Iraq?" Sanderson then asked his Captain.

"Not exactly."

Sanderson watched his Captain warily, "Well I out of guesses. Tell me or get out, I am late for breakfast."

The officer looked from Sanderson to the Captain, stunned at Sanderson's blatant disregard for the higher-ranking officer.

While the Captain explained the job to Sanderson, Diana threw Rachael more waffles from the kitchen. The once loud room had fallen dead silent.

So silent her mommy radar kicked into action.

She peeked in the doorway and asked, "What are you four up to?"

The four heads looked up at her.

It was Jordan who quietly asked, "Why is that man here?"

Diana then knew why they were so quiet, she sighed, "I don't know." She rubbed her back and felt a familiar ache.

Robin quietly muttered under her breath, "Well we don't have anyone else that can die."

"They're not sending daddy back? Are they?" Alexandria then asked.

The four heads watched Diana, begging for answers. Answers Diana could not give them. She lied, "No. He just got home, he'll be home for a while. Don't worry."

They took comfort in that, even though Rachael knew it was a lie.

She ate her waffles without a word.

Diana ignored the cramps and hit the thermostat with her hand, kicking it down forty degrees, the house felt like a sauna.

"They aren't going to separate us?"

Diana looked into the room, unsure of who spoke as she pulled off her sweater, making sure her long sleeve shirt underneath covered her stomach. She shook her head, "I won't let them sweetie."

The four children watched as Diana then hit the thermostat again, as she was suddenly cold.

"Mom?" Robin asked.

Diana winced at a sharp pain in her back. Knowing what was happening, she told them, "Why don't you guys go grab some clothes and go visit Uncle Matt?"

Robin and Jordan shared a look, Alexandria asked, "You're having the baby? Aren't you?"

Diana shook her head, "Not yet. Just go grab some stuff to do ok? Go on." She waited until all four kids ran from the room and up the stairs, then she felt water run down her leg.


	3. Chapter 3

"When do we get to go and see Mommy?" Robin asked Eversman or Uncle Matty as all four kids called him. She stood in the kitchen doorway with her arms crossed, not wanting to watch the TV.

At her side stood Alexandria.

Both girls were within a year of age, both had brown eyes and hair, but Alexandria's was much darker then Robins, Robin was also paler skinned then Alexandria. But both had hair down to their bottoms. Both of them had let Jamie braid their hair.

Eversman looked down at the girls, peeking into the living room where his wife sat on the couch and braided Rachael's hair, at her side sat Jordan. He then looked down at the two girls, "Look, I would love to take you down and visit your mom in the hospital, but you girls aren't going to be allowed in the delivery room. Plus we don't know how long she'll be in labor, she could be in labor all day long."

Robin narrowed her eyes, Alexandria looked to the two year old in the high chair then asked, "How long did you stay at home until you went to the hospital?"

Eversman looked to his daughter, then back at Robin and Alexandria, "Go get something to do, we'll go to the hospital."

The two girls ran from the kitchen, Eversman lifted his daughter out of the highchair, her face covered in bananas and peaches, she clapped and wiped her face on his sleeve. He walked into the living room and up behind his wife, he gave her a kiss, "I'm taking the girls to the hospital. Jordan, you wanna come along?"

Jordan looked to his beloved Aunt Jamie, then got up, "Yeah."

Jamie looked up and kissed Eversman cheek, she took their daughter from him, "I'll be by the hospital once Lily gets finished at her piano lesson." At Jamie's feet Rachael stood and quickly decided that she didn't need the rest of her hair braided. She ran through the toy filled living room after Jordan.

**Around Noon…..**

Eversman checked his watch, then looked up at the TV.

Beside him Jordan complained, "I'm hungry."

Beside Jordan in one chair were Robin and Alexandria reading a Cosmo, and on the other side of Eversman Rachael was curled up in a ball asleep. They'd been in the waiting room for three hours.

He leaned forward on his knees, peering down the hall, a break room with soda and candy machine lay inside. He pulled out his wallet and asked, "Is anyone else hungry?"

Both Robin and Alexandria dropped their magazine, "Yes," they both chirped. Eversman dug through his wallet and gave Jordan a handful of ones, everything in his wallet, and then added, "Bring me back a Snickers bar."

The three kids ran from the waiting room and down the hall.

Eversman looked around the room.

Three-month-old magazines, toys, a TV nailed to the wall, pink wallpaper and matching carpet. Now and then a nurse would come in and tell them that Diana was still in labor, but that was all. He glanced over his shoulder at the sleeping girl on his arm. Then he sat back and rubbed her back, looking up at the ceiling tiles.

**A couple hours later…..**

The soft beeping noise helped wake Diana up, she moved her hand to hit the snooze button, but a sharp pain in her wrist woke her up completely. She lifted her hand and saw a butterfly needle in her arm. Her eyes followed the plastic tube up to the IV stand at her bed.

Without a second thought she began to pull at the tape that held the needle in her arm.

A hand gently fell over her own, Sanderson's soft voice whispered, "Leave it in."

Diana looked over to the side of the bed where he was seated in a chair, with a sleeping baby on his chest. Diana blinked and looked at her sleeping son. Wrapped in a white hospital blanket with a knitted cap upon his little head.

She pushed herself into a sitting position, finding herself very sore, "How long was I asleep?"

In a whisper he answered her question, "Right after he came out you fell asleep."

Diana nodded, her brown hair pulled up in a bun.

Very slowly Sanderson sat up, "You want to hold your son?" She nodded and watched as he stood up without waking her newborn son. Something that took years of practice, as a father he had mastered it. Sanderson lifted the tiny infant from his chest. Still red skinned, the movement made the baby open it's eyes and mouth.

Sanderson laid the baby down on Diana's chest, she placed her hand on the baby's bottom and looked into its brown eyes.

"Hi," she softly whispered, then kissed it's tiny forehead.

Sanderson pulled the chair he had been seated upon closer so her could put his elbows on the bed and stare at the baby with Diana.

The baby was back asleep after a few seconds.

Softly she asked, "Did he behave?"

Sanderson nodded, "He should be hungry soon, I changed one diaper already. The Doctor has already checked in on him."

Diana looked up at him, only inches away, "Thank you."

He smiled and nodded, then leaned over and kissed her forehead. Then looked down at the sleeping baby, "He has Hoot's eyes."

Diana nodded, "I saw that….what color hair does he have?"

"None. The baby is bald. I'm sorry."

With a look back to her child she muttered, "Your one to criticize."

Her sharp remark made him smile. He watched her admire her child, softly touch it's soft skin, even place soft kisses on it. When she spoke he was surprised, "What did those men want?"

He was surprised at her question, but neither of them took their eyes off the baby. Not even Sanderson, "My Captain….he offered me a job."

Quietly she asked, "A third tour?"

"No. They want to move me to a base over in Europe."

Diana finally looked up at him.

Sanderson continued, "I am not going to take the job unless you will come with me. I need your help. So if you don't want to move your children, I'll understand. It's not a big deal."

She listened, knowing he needed help with his children as much as she needed his help. Knowing that if they were to separate the children it would probably lead to trouble in the future.

Diana felt her son's hand curl into a small fist, she rubbed his back and asked, "What will you be doing?"

Sanderson held her gaze and she smiled, "You can't tell me?" He shook his head in response, "No. But it would mean a slightly bigger paycheck. A bigger house on base….if that is even possible. Less time in the field, but when I go it'll be off the record you could say."

Diana closed her eyes and fell back in the bed, careful not to wake the baby, she took a breath then told him, "So if you get killed you don't get brought home. You were never there. Your children just get a really big paycheck."

"Yeah," he answered. Hearing her tell him what he already knew brought it closer to heart. It also made it even more clearer why Hoot had loved her so much, how understanding she was of things his wife couldn't and wouldn't even consider, things he kept hidden from her.

Diana finally opened her eyes and looked down at him, "If you want to do it, we'll come along with you. But don't do it for the money."

With a nod he stood up, "Ok. I have to go phone in my demands."

A smile crossed her face, she looked down at her son and thought about what she would name him.


	4. Chapter 4

Authors note, Ok, I think there is an Army base in Italy, if I'm wrong tell me please.

Standing in front of the world map on the living room wall Jordan asked, "Where the hell are we going again?"

Across the living room on the couch Robin made a face of discontent, "Why do we have to travel the day before Christmas? All our presents are going to be packed away."

Jordan ignored her question, asking, "Did Dad say where we were going? Or is it a surprise?"

Robin sat up, storming across the living room, hissing at the cat that lay under the tree. She took the thumbtack from his hand and slammed it onto a country in Europe. "Italy! We have to go to Italy!" At that she stomped from the living room full of cardboard boxes packed full. Jordan stared at the map, "Huh. You would think she'd be happier, she loves Italian food."

She stomped into the hall, into Sanderson who gently took her arm, "Hey. No one is happy about the flight ok? So stop yelling and go finish packing ok? If you wake up Daniel your mother will beat your ass, and then she'll yell at me for letting you wake the baby up."

Robin smiled, then sighed, "Fine! But I call dibs on the window seat here and now."

"Too late, your sister already called dibs on it."

Robin pouted, "That bitch!"

Sanderson glared, "Hey! Language! What did I tell you about swearing?"

Robin thought about it, "Not in front of Mommy?"

He thought about it, then nodded, "Good girl. Now go fight your sister for the seat."

"You bet your ass I am," she declared on her way to the kitchen, where the cookies were, where Rachael would be.

"Atta girl," he encouraged, with a quick peek in the living room, "What'cha doin sport?"

Jordan looked up, "Italy?"

Sanderson walked into the living room and behind his son, looking at the map that Diana had got the kids into. There were five thumbtacks so far. "Dad, I know we don't do the Christmas thing, which is fine and all, but I wanna open presents, so can we like, bring them on the plane?"

Sanderson looked over at the tree, then shook his head, "No. But you can bring the cat on the plane."

Jordan looked up at his father, "Cat?"

The look and tone told Sanderson that there shouldn't have been a cat in the house. Jordan looked over at the cat under the tree, "Dad, we don't have a cat. We have a bunny rabbit."

"Really?" Sanderson mused, trying to remember if he had seen a rabbit.

Fear filled Jordan, "Where's Bugs?"

Jordan then realized what happened, "Oh no! The fish! I have to go check on the fish!"

Sanderson watched his son run out of the living room. Then called after him, "Did you pack?" He then looked over at the cat. Who looked like it had a rather full stomach.

Sanderson walked out of the kitchen, and headed for the stairs. He waited to be sure there were to screams or sounds of fighting. Then he climbed the stairs and headed for the nursery. Avoiding cardboard boxes that filled the hall.

When he came to the nursery he peeked inside and saw boxes on the floor. An air mattress on the floor beside the crib where the baby, Daniel, slept. When he slept. Daniel clung to his mother like a little monkey while he nursed, seated in the rocker, one of the few things left unpacked.

"Psssst."

Diana looked up, "Hmmmm?"

He remained in the hall, "There's a cat under the tree."

"We don't have a cat. We have a bunny and fish."

Sanderson ran a hand through his hair, "Yeah, about that bunny and fish."

Diana sighed and made sure Daniel was finished, then she put everything back in its place and stood, careful not to wake the suddenly sleepy child. He'd been up all night and day, and finally crashed. As gently as she could she patted his back until he burped.

Out in the hall Sanderson grinned at the noise.

Without waking Daniel she walked to the crib and laid him down on his stomach, then pulled a blanket over his legs. She waited to be sure he wouldn't wake up, then she turned the baby monitor on and walked out of the nursery, into the hall where Sanderson waited.

"How do you think he'll do on the trip?"

Diana made a face, with her eyes on her son she shrugged, "I don't know, he's almost a week old, Sanderson. He eats, sleeps, and shits."

He nodded, knowing the activities of infants.

Diana leant against the wall and looked to Sanderson, "He's too young for shots. I don't want anyone touching him. Sneezing on him. I don't want anyone near him. The last thing I need is him to get sick so young. You know how everyone loves babies and wants to touch them."

"Well the kids are carrying all their own stuff, I can carry his diaper bag if you wear that papoose thing, I'll make sure no one touches him. We just have to be sure we don't loose the other four."

She smacked her forehead, "Damn. I forgot about them, its too bad Eversman isn't flying out till the twenty eighth."

"Don't worry, I'll run out and buy one of those leash things for kids, we can tie them all together and hook them up to the diaper bag," Sanderson suggested.

Diana nodded, "Well if we loose them all the airport won't let any planes leave until they find their parents. That's actually a good idea."

"Besides if we loose them all think of the money we'll save on college."

Diana smacked his arm, "Go buy a dozen of those kiddy leashes and Benadryl."

Sanderson looked puzzled, "Benadryl?"

She nodded, "If they get too unruly we can drug them, it'll wear off by the time we land."

"My God you're a genius," he commented.

"I know," she answered, then headed down the stairs as he went to his bedroom for his wallet. Diana grabbed the baby monitor off the cardboard box she had left it on earlier and hooked it on her jeans, as she made her way down the stairs she turned the monitor on. Hearing her son sleeping.

She made her way in the kitchen where Robin was sitting on her sister, while Rachael tried to strangle her older sister.

Diana sighed and went to the two, lifting Robin up, "Enough!"

Immediately they stopped.

Diana put Robin down, "Did you two pack?"

They both nodded.

Diana put her hands on her hips, "So if I go upstairs in your room there will be nothing that belongs to you unpacked?"

The two girls thought about it, Diana then said, "Upstairs!"

Both of them ran from the kitchen.

Diana then shouted, "Jordan!" She heard his feet as he came running from the laundry room, "Yes?"

"Did you finish packing?"

"Packing what," he asked.

It wasn't his question but tone that made Diana curious, "Why? What did you pack?"

He then told her, "I packed everything in the bathroom, the pantry, the linen closet, my stuff, and Daniels." It took everything she had to keep a straight face. Diana then asked, "Where's your sister?"

Jordan shrugged.

Diana then jerked her head toward the kitchen doorway, "Go make sure Rachael and Robin are all packed, then check on Daniel please." He mimicked a Buddhist Monk he had seen, palming his hands he bowed, then ran upstairs.

Jordan passed Sanderson on his way up, "Where you going Dad?"

"The store," Sanderson answered.

"Pick me up a pack of camels," Jordan called on his way up, making Sanderson turn, "I don't think so."

Sanderson watched his son bound down the hall and rolled his eyes. On his way out Diana caught his arm, he looked down into her green eyes, she told him, "Alexandria's been gone since dinner."

With a look around the hall he asked, "Where's her hiding spot?"

"The tree house."

Sanderson nodded, "I'll bring her along with me to the store."

Diana watched as he grabbed his leather coat from the coat rack and headed outside into the snowy night.

Sanderson made his way across the snow covered backyard and saw a dim light up in the single tree which held a wooden box like tree house.

He made his way under the tree then climbed up the wooden pieces of wood nailed up the trunk, until he came to a wooden hatch, which he knocked on.

He listened to his daughter crawl along the floor, then open the wooden hatch, "Daddy?"

Sanderson crawled up into the small fort.

Being in much smaller places he didn't mind the cramped space.

He looked around and saw his wife's old prayer matt, her old prayer beads, and her Koran. He looked at his daughter who quietly told him, "I wanted to pray one last time here."

Sanderson understood, Alexandria had turned to her faith when her mother had died while his son had shunned it. She prayed a dozen times a day while her brother prayed now and then. Alexandria became more religious while Jordan didn't want anything to do with any religion.

"You'll get to pray in the morning," he offered.

Watching as she carefully rolled up her prayer matt, then tied it closed. She picked up the beads and put them in a cloth pouch. Then sat on her knees and laid the book upon her lap, she ran her hand over it softly. "Not outside. Mom used to love to pray outside."

"I know," he softly told her.

Alexandria looked up at her father, "Do you believe in any God?"

Surprised by her question, he thought about it. He had been drug to church as a child but never really paid attention. As a teenager he had been distracted by a leggy red head. As an adult he had converted to Islam but only to get married, after that he didn't really do much religiously.

"I believe we were created by a higher being. There is just too much that cannot be explained by science, and lots of science that just seems far-fetched. But I don't know which God is real."

Alexandria looked down at her book, "Diana takes me to the mosque to pray, she sits outside and waits with Jordan. Jordan is mad at God."

"I am too," Sanderson told his daughter.

With a forced smile, Alexandria looked up at her dad, "I think Jordan hates God."

Sanderson shook his head, he crawled over to his daughter and kissed her forehead, "No he doesn't. He's just angry….he's too young to hate, or know what hate is."

Alexandria leaned against her dad, she laid her head against his arm, "He doesn't even like missionaries that come door to door."

Silently Sanderson agreed with his son, but he told his daughter, "He just hurts. But you're lucky."

Confused she looked up at her dad.

"You found comfort in your faith. That's something special, you are very very lucky." He told her, looking down into her mothers brown eyes. Wishing he had the same faith and trust that his daughter did.

Alexandria then asked, "When he gets older, and less mad, would you come to the mosque with us?"

"Absolutely, I'll take you to the mosque now if you want."

"Can we go now? One last time before we go?"

Sanderson nodded, "All right, lets go."


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note, Ok, so in a few days I start school again, woohoo. With the remaining days off I wanted to get some stuff done, the rest of my bags unpacked, and maybe some writing done. After a trip through like four airports and customs this summer I noticed families traveling.

Funniest damn thing in the world.

Especially if there are dads and teenage sons, it's like watching male rams fight. And then there are the nosey people.

Enjoy and review.

After almost twenty hours on planes, in airports, and layovers. Sanderson watched out the window at the landscape below the plane.

Italy.

In a few minutes they would land and make their way through the airport where a plain clothed man from base would pick them up. Their luggage was already taken care of.

Sanderson looked over at the empty seat beside him, then the row of seats in the middle with four seats across full of four sleeping children. All four were out as if they were dead. After fifteen hours wide awake from the excitement they had finally crashed. All four were slumped over in their seats at angles that would have been painful to any other person.

He checked his watch, 9:30.

He hadn't slept more then ten minutes at a time for most the trip. Still dressed in the clothes he had left the states in, they all were, Sanderson however had formula and baby vomit in patches on his clothes. A two-day beard. And breath that would wake the dead. His mints were up in the diaper bag above his head, after a moment of thought he decided he didn't have the energy to get up and get one.

"Hey, wake up," spoke Diana's husky, tired voice from behind.

Sanderson glanced up as she came down the aisle from the bathroom. The baby asleep against her chest. Her clothes also showed signs of the baby from the long flights. Her hair that had once been pulled up in a bun now hung down in strands.

Sanderson picked up the pillow from her seat as Diana sat down, careful not to wake the infant. "How much did the monkey eat?"

Diana made a face, she looked down over her sleeping son as Sanderson reached over and ran his fingers over the baby's soft small hand. "I don't know….I couldn't exactly keep track of measurements smartass."

"Well that'll teach you to pump more milk for international flights."

Diana lifted her free hand and flipped him off, "I filled like fifteen bottles. I didn't think he'd eat this much."

With a smile Sanderson noticed a woman from in front of them. Peering over the seat without shame or a care of privacy. Diana glanced up, instinctively putting her free hand over Daniel's head.

The older woman smiled, "That's beautiful. Is he your first?"

Diana looked over at Sanderson who shook his head, "No. Our other four are over in that row." A smile crept over Diana's face. She could hear the hidden annoyance in Sanderson's voice and could only image what Hoot would have told the woman. When the elderly woman looked over at the four sleeping children a look of surprise crossed her face.

Both Alexandria and Jordan shared their mother's Middle Eastern skin tone and features. Rachael and Robin however looked like both Hoot and Diana. She then looked back to Sanderson and Diana, unsure of what to say.

Sanderson smiled, "My wife gave birth to all five of my children. Aren't they beautiful?"

The woman looked back at the sleeping children, then to Daniel, and then Sanderson, "They're _all_ yours?"

Sanderson nodded, "All five."

Diana grinned broadly, "They look just like their father. Can't you see the resemblance?"

With a pause, the woman forced a smile, "Oh yes." At that she turned around in her seat without another word.

Diana slumped sideways into Sanderson's strong arm, she put her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. He kissed the top of her head, "Wake your ass up. If I don't get to nap, you don't get to nap. Besides we're landing in a few minutes."

A groan came from Diana.

Sanderson kissed her again, "Hand me the monkey and grab that baby holder thingy."

Diana nodded and slowly sat up, careful not to wake the baby. She peeled him from her chest and handed him to Sanderson's outstretched reach. Handling the sleeping child as if he were a bomb, Sanderson laid him on his chest. He placed a soft kiss on Daniel's soft head and rubbed the baby's back. With a sigh the infant settled onto the new chest and continued to sleep.

Diana stood and opened up the overhead compartment, she took out the papoose, closed the lid, then took a seat, "What will we do about those four?"

Sanderson glanced up then asked, "We have to wake them up?"

With a shake of her head Diana began to loosen the straps, she then motioned for Sanderson to sit up. With great care not to wake the baby he sat up and slid Daniel into the papoose, Diana took the straps and wrapped them around his waist and hooked them, she wrapped the other two up around his neck and hooked them. Only when Diana gave the straps a firm pull and they were certain the holder wouldn't move did Sanderson let go of the papoose which held the sleeping baby.

"Do you know who will meet us?" She asked softly as she took a seat and hooked her belt again. Sanderson shook his head, "No. A civilian dressed Delta is all I know…I do know the base fell under new command." Even though he spoke in a soft voice the baby still stirred from the vibrations.

"Who," Diana asked.

With a smile Sanderson teased, "You're Father and Hoot were big fans of his."

"Just tell me already," Diana spat.

As Sanderson stroked the knitted cap upon the baby's head he told Diana, "You know him as Captain Steele, but I don't know his new rank."

The surprise could not be hidden from Diana's face. "Does he know you're coming?"

With a nod Sanderson replied, "He was the one who requested me."

Diana stared in surprise at him. Just as the captain came over the speaker and told them they would be landing within a few minutes in Italian. She then looked over at the four sleeping children. Sanderson set his hand on her shoulder, "Wait till we land. Unless you want to relive the landing commentary from Jordan like earlier in London, D.C., and Germany."

"I forgot about that," she muttered softly, then relaxed in her seat as the plane lost altitude subtly. She peered across the seat and watched as the plane came closer and closer to the landing strip of the large airport.

Diana watched the plane draw closer and closer to the runway, when it hit all four kids woke up.

The girls yawned and glanced around as the plane made it's way down the bumpy runway, Jordan declared, "I'm hungry."

"Me too," Robin added, beside her Alexandria nodded, "D, I'm really hungry."

From the far end of the seats Rachael shouted out over the plane and people inside, "Are we there yet?"

Diana checked her watch, it had been four hours since they had airport pizza. She looked at all the dark brown eyes that stared at her, "Come on guys, we just got here. Once we get through the airport and find our….."

"Ride," Jordan offered as he unhooked his seatbelt and pulled his backpack from under the seat in front of him.

"Ride…we'll either get something on the way, or I'll feed y'all on the base."

"But I'm hungry now," Robin argued from beside Jordan, a safe distance from her mothers swat reach. Diana narrowed her eyes and her oldest daughter fell silent. "I know you guys are hungry. I'm hungry too. All I have are mints and chap stick."

Rachael peered around Alexandria, "What flavor chap stick?"

Sensing a revolt Sanderson leant forward in his seat, the airport in view from behind him. He pointed at all four children, "Chill out. You guys ate most the night. You'll eat, don't worry, just let us get through the airport without any lip."

"What about when we get _out_ of the airport?" Jordan asked, which just earned him a glare from his father, "Don't be a smartass."

"What about a dumba," Jordan began until he was belted by Robin who hissed at him, "Shutup! If you get grounded how the hell are we gonna have fun with you in trouble?"

Diana set a hand on Sanderson's thigh, feeding him his words back, "Just chill out, it was a long trip for everyone."


	6. Chapter 6

_Authors note, Ok, so I am moving this along. Had a few ideas. Kinda. So review with suggestions. Like it, hate it, punctuation sucks. Anything is helpful. Enjoy. I had to move it along a little. For healing time and all that._

**Almost a year later……**

Sanderson watched the Doctor shine the flashlight in his son's eye and tried his best not to say a word.

After all, the Doctor knew what he was doing. Or so Sanderson told himself over and over again while Diana was off getting pictures of his son's skull while all the other children were in the nurse's lounge.

The bruise on Jordan's head bothered him in more ways then one. Not just because it was his son. But he was supposed to be watching Jordan. Which was how they ended up in the E.R. while Diana was at work.

The Doctor shone the light in Jordan's other eye, asking Sanderson, "How long was he unconscious?"

Sanderson stood up straight, from his spot against the wall. "About a few minutes. Once I heard him fall off the roof I ran outside."

The Doctor nodded, "What did he land on?"

"Snow," Sanderson told him.

Jordan was unusually quiet, due to painkillers for the concussion he had received from his trip off the roof on the sled. A common childhood accident.

The middle aged Doctor stood and put the mini light in his typical white jacket, he looked to Sanderson, "I want to see the scans before I make any decisions. I still would like to keep him in for the night. For observation."

Sanderson nodded, "Can I?"

The Doctor nodded, he walked across the room to the sink where the medical chart was. Sanderson went to his son who was a galaxy away. His eyes heavily dilated. It took a moment for Jordan to recognize his dad, and another for him to smile, "Hii Daaaaad."

Sanderson ran a hand over his son's wrist, "How do you feel?"

Jordan laughed silently, "Everything is moving!"

Knowing what his son was feeling Sanderson remained silent, he looked at the nasty bruise that would take weeks to heal.

Then the door opened.

Both men looked up as Diana came in with the films. She gave Jordan's foot an assuring squeeze, then went to the light box on the wall and shoved the films in the two boxes. Showing pictures of Jordan's Skull.

For a moment Sanderson swore he saw the Doctor check Diana out, but when the Doctor looked over the films he shook it off. Instead he asked Diana, "Is anything broken?"

Diana shook her head and looked over her shoulder at Sanderson, "No thank God, it's just a severe concussion. So the next time he decides to ride his sled off the roof make sure he has a helmet on."

The Doctor took a close look, without turning he asked, "Did Jordan have any problems seeing?"

Sanderson wasn't sure, "I don't know."

The Doctor looked to Diana, when she didn't look up from Jordon he spoke up, "Di."

Diana looked to the Doctor.

"I want to keep him in here for observation. If there is any swelling I want to know. When did you give him the med?"

Diana looked at her watch, "Eight forty three."

The Doctor looked to Sanderson, "At four the meds will wear off and if there are any changes in his condition I'll personally call you." He took a pen from his coat and wrote down med information. Sanderson looked to Diana, she gave him a smile, "Why don't you take the rest of our herd home. I'll give you a call every hour until we come home."

Sanderson nodded, he held his sons hand, but could not help but notice the Doctors reaction to Diana's words. Inwardly he told himself not to notice or care, he had two beautiful children to worry about, and then three nieces and nephew and then Diana. But he couldn't help it. He told himself again and again it was just because she was Hoot's wife. She was family. That he was being protective of her, deep down he knew it was a lie.

Diana walked around the bed and pulled up the sides. Just to be sure Jordan didn't roll out. She looked at the monitors the boy she had grown so fond of was attached to. She then turned to Sanderson and put her hand on his shoulder, "Go home and get the kids in bed. Go to bed. We'll be fine. I'll feed him hospital jello."

A smile came over Sanderson's face, but he felt the Doctor's eyes on him when Diana touched him.

Finally the Doctor spoke up, "Sir, I'll need your autograph up at the desk."

Sanderson nodded but didn't look at the Doctor. Instead he leaned over and kissed Jordan's forehead, "I'll see you in the morning son."

Jordan laughed, "Cool."

Sanderson looked to Diana who assured him, "It's a normal reaction to the meds. Tomorrow he'll sleep like a log. I'll keep a eye on him."

A look of concern came over Sanderson's face, "You work thirteen hours tonight. You need your sleep tomorrow." She made a face, kissed his cheek, then smacked it gently, "Go home!"

Inwardly Sanderson was already making plans to have Jamie come over and watch Jordan while Diana slept, but he nodded, half distracted by the Doctor watching Diana from the corner of his eye.

Finally Sanderson followed the Doctor out and through the E.R., up to the desk. Sanderson could not help but look the doctor over. Measure the man up. He was clearly more handsome, richer.

Had more hair.

A Rolex, designer glasses, perfect facial structure. Everything a woman would find attractive. No wedding band.

He gave Sanderson a clipboard and pointed out the places to sign, then asked, "Your married?"

Sanderson shook his head, "Widowed." He then went through and began to sign his name everyplace that was X-ed.

"You and Diana share a house?"

Sanderson never looked up, he could hear the curiosity in the good Doctors voice. He didn't need to see the mans face. "Yeah, the same address as on her word I.D. card. Why?"

"Insurance purposes."

It took all Sanderson had not to roll his eyes. He then gave the Doctor the clipboard back, "Anything else?"

The Doctor flashed his perfect pearly whites, "No Sir. If there is any problem or change in your sons condition I'll personally call you."

Sanderson forced a smile, then headed to the nurses station which was no more then a big office/lab/TV room/locker room. He peeked inside where Alexandria, Robin, and Rachael were seated on the couch with the baby, watching Jerry Springer in Italian.

All three heads looked to Sanderson.

Who spoke before they could ask, "Jordan's fine. He's going to spend the night and Diana will bring him home in the morning."

He crossed the empty room in three strides and lifted Daniel from the pillow he was on. Asleep. The motion woke him up but Sanderson expertly bounced him back to sleep.

Rachael yawned and fell over on her sister's lap.

Robin patted her head, "Well, maybe Jordan will scare Mr. Doctor Man away from Mom."

Sanderson cocked an eyebrow.

Robin made a face, "Please. The man is like a dog. He'll be gone soon when he's done smellin around."

"No more Jerry Spring for you," Sanderson told her.


	7. Chapter 7

_Authors note, this is actually based kinda on a true story. Kinda. When I was little my brother and I tried to sneak a chicken in the house inside a milk crate. Out sister noticed and made us bring it back outside. So the chicken part is true._

**Later……**

For the past hour the baby had cried. It cried and cried and cried. It woke everyone in the house up.

First Sanderson sat in the rocking chair and tried to rock Daniel back to sleep.

No luck.

Then he changed a clean diaper, heated up a bottle.

The baby wasn't hungry.

He then walked around the bedroom bouncing the baby, which didn't work.

Sanderson then heard voices and a odd noise out in the hall.

With the screaming baby on his shoulder he opened the bedroom door and flipped the hall light on. Catching the three kids in the hall with a box. Inside the box came unmistakable noises.

All three kids froze.

Each in their pajamas.

Alexandria was first to speak up, "Hi Dad. What'cha doin?"

Sanderson put Daniel on his hip, then asked, "Why is there a chicken in that box? And why are you four out of bed?"

"What chicken?" Robin asked.

Sanderson looked to her, "The one in the box. Go put it out in the garage."

"But Harry will freeze to death!" Rachael screamed. Letting go of her end of the box, which caused the bottom to give way and the chicken to fall out and on the floor. Then run down the hall on two scaly legs.

"Run Harry!" Rachael screeched, which caused Daniel to scream even louder.

Alexandria and Robin ran after the big white chicken.

Sanderson pointed at Rachael, "The Chicken is not staying"

She stuck her tongue out and yelled, "His name is Harry! Chickens have dreams of a better future! Maybe Harry doesn't want to be someone's dinner!"

Biting off his anger.

Reminding himself Rachael was a little girl, Hoot's little girl, Diana's little girl.

Sanderson told her, "Well then Harry better get his feathered ass out of my house!"

Rachael again stuck her tongue out, then froze, hearing the garage door open. Sanderson pointed again at her, "You hear that! That's your mother! You better get that chicken out of the house!"

When Rachael ran down the hall after Harry, Sanderson headed the other way, towards the front of the house. While Daniel screamed. Sanderson placed a kiss upon the baby's head, "It's ok little man. You're mommy's home. In a few minutes you get to fondle her breasts, you lucky little toothless wonder child."

Daniel screamed, buried his face against Sanderson's side.

The house was a simple one-story house with a dozen or so rooms. Each kid had his or her own room. Diana and Sanderson had their own room. There was a kitchen, living room, garage, dining room, laundry room, and a bathroom.

The garage was not connected by door to the house.

So Sanderson walked to the front door as something glass broke within the house, and a chicken made a screeching noise.

Sanderson ignored the noise, he opened the front door just as Jordan came barreling up the walk.

"Whoa! Son! Chill out, I am not driving you to the E.R. again!"

Jordan came to a stop, his face bruised darkly, painfully. Jordan looked up at his father, pink doughnut icing on his face, his eye glittered. "I got to watch Diana put a catheter in!"

Sanderson made a face and looked to Diana as Jordan ran past.

Half awake, a box of doughnuts in her hand, she held up a hand, "I didn't see him until it was already halfway in, so shut it."

Sanderson took the box of doughnuts, her backpack and handed her her child. Who quieted down after a few moments. Daniel rubbed his face against her chest, clung to her.

Sanderson opened the box and kicked the door closed.

Diana kissed her son and then froze. She looked around the house, "Do I hear a chicken?"

He shook his head, mouth full of glazed doughnuts, "Harry."

"Who," she asked, looking at him.

Sanderson walked into the living room and dropped her work-pack on the living room couch. Then swallowed, "He has dreams of a better life."

While the baby slid his hand in her shirt, she collapsed on the couch. Just as a large white chicken ran through the living room. In front of her and Sanderson and out the other door.

Diana looked up to Sanderson, "Harry?"

He fell down beside her and nodded, "Yes."

Diana plopped her feet up on the coffee table as the four kids ran past them, they stopped. Diana cocked her head, "Why is Harry here?"

The four exchanged looks.

While Sanderson ate his doughnut Robin asked, "You know his name?"

"I'm psychic."

The kids shared a look, then Rachael cried, "Mommy I found him on the road by the front of the base. He fell off a chicken truck and if a chicken falls off then they kill it! Harry doesn't wanna die!"

Too tired to argue, Diana told her, "Catch it before it craps all over the place and stick it in the garage." She pointed to Jordan, "YOU! You have a concussion, sit your ass down and watch TV."

With a stomp of his foot Jordan went to the recliner and sat down. Sanderson patted her thigh and sat up, "I'm going to go take a shower and get ready for work."

Diana rolled her head to the side, "Take a shower for me to while you're in there."


	8. Chapter 8

It was a dream just like many others before, but it was different.

Diana had fallen asleep on the couch, Daniel asleep on her chest, Jordan wide-awake in front of the TV while everyone else was at school. Jerry Springer was on in Italian.

The dream was nothing more then a wish.

Images of passion filled the dream.

_It had started out quietly as always with the children down the hall, playfully. First he would wake her with soft kisses along her neck, her shoulder, and back. Until she woke up._

_Until she rolled over and playfully smacked him, hissing at him to stop and go to sleep._

_Quickly he would kiss her….change her mind._

_Until she gave in and whispered that they had to be quiet, they couldn't make too much noise, the kids were down the hall. _

_When he began to take her nightshirt off she quieted down. And began to take his pajamas off as well. Running her hands over his warm alive skin._

_Placing kisses on his soft skin._

_She placed her hands on his waist as he climbed on top of her. She ran her hands up and over his chest. It seemed slightly thinner, not something the casual person would notice. He was taller too. _

_She looked up into Sanderson's face._

_It was not repulsion or guilt that crossed her mind, nothing even close._

_She reached up and ran her hand across his face. Looking up in his blue eyes she leaned up and kissed him._

_Slowly._

_Feeling his body against her own, something that hadn't been for some time. As he returned her kiss. Slowly pushing her back down into the bed, _she woke up.

Diana sat up as the front door slammed.

She peered over the back of the couch as Matt Eversman walked in with the mail. When he saw her he smiled, "Afternoon."

Diana looked at her watch, 3:25.

With a quick look at the sleeping baby in the playpen, Diana stood up. "Whatever….where'd Jamie go?"

Eversman smiled and sorted through the mail, "She went to pick up the kids at the bus stop. Sanderson was stopping at the food store on his way home."

Diana nodded, she walked over to Jordan and picked up a mini flashlight from the tray table at his side. Where a drink, a box of crackers, and assorted medical toys that Diana had stolen from the hospital were. His homework neatly piled on the floor. Untouched.

She flicked the light on and said, "Look up."

He did.

She shone the light in his eyes, one, then the other. Then asked, "Does anything hurt?"

"Nope," he replied, looking back at the TV.

Diana looked over the bruise.

She then asked, "When did you take your last pill?"

Jordan handed her a pad of paper, where he kept track of when he took his pills, when he felt dizzy, when his head hurt, when he went to the bathroom, and any phone calls he took.

Eversman came to a Cosmo and dropped the rest of the mail on the hall table.

Diana glanced up and sighed, "That's from the previous tenants."

"Uh-huh," he answered.

He leaned against the wall and flipped to page 45, how to please your man.

Diana looked over the paper Jordan had kept. She walked to Eversman and picked up the mail. Muttering as she sorted through it, "Bill, bill, junk, junk, card, ooo catalogue, bill, Jordan your Nickelodeon Magazine is here, so is your fathers Mad Magazine, junk, Christmas card."

Diana threw Jordan his magazine and missed his hand by inches.

"Dammit," he swore.

Diana didn't bother to correct him.

"Holy hell," Eversman muttered.

Diana glanced up as she put the mail back, he pointed to a sentence in the magazine. She nodded, "It's lots of fun. I did it with Hoot all the time."

Eversman was surprised, Jordan asked, "Did what?"

Guiltily he closed the magazine, Diana told Jordan, "Played Golf."

Jordan knew she was lying, "Nu-uh! Uncle Hoot hated golf, he said it was for old men in bad pants."

Diana looked to Jordan and told him, "Did **_ it_** then."

"Eww," Jordan cried, his face utterly disgusted. "Diana," Eversman hissed.

She rolled her eyes and rubbed the back of her neck.

"Oh, some Doctor in a Benz is outside for you."

Diana cocked a eyebrow, "Please tell me he doesn't look like a poster-boy for GQ." Eversman nodded, "Why?"

She ran a hand through her hair.

Then said, "If I am not back in five minutes, call me and tell me my father is on the phone."

Eversman was confused, then said, "Ok."

In a pair of jeans and a simple oversized Army hoodie, Diana walked to the front door. Barefooted she walked outside and closed the front door. Sure enough a black Mercedes was parked in front of the house.

Dr. Chris Dockery was seated in the drivers seat.

Annoyed, Diana walked across the snowy yard to the car.

Arms crossed she motioned for him to roll down the window. He climbed out of the car and looked at her bare feet, "Di…I came to see if the boy was ok?"

She narrowed her eyes, "Jordan?"

"Yeah. Jordan. How is he?"

Diana pursed her lips, "Ok. The Meds are working. He kept everything down and has been normal in the bathroom. Good yellow urine and he has regular stool. His eyes are just a little dilated, but that's just from the Meds."

"Wonderful."

"How did you know where I live?"

He smiled, when he saw she didn't return it he told her, "I looked at your file."

"My personnel file?"

Unsure if she was angry or not, he nodded, "I just wanted to make sure he was ok."

"Well Jordan is inside, Doc." She glanced up as Sanderson's beaten up Jeep came down the street and pulled into the drive, beside the pristine Mercedes.

Sanderson climbed out, less then pleased at the sight of Chris.

He grabbed a bag from the back.

Diana brushed past Chris and walked to the Jeep, she walked along the side of the Jeep to where Sanderson was, he whispered, "Tell me he's leaving."

Surprised at the annoyance in his voice, Diana told him, "Make him go away."

Sanderson looked at her. Surprised at her bluntness. "You don't like handsome Doctor man?"

Diana narrowed her eyes and grabbed the bags from him, "Eat me." She then looked to Chris, "This is Jordan's father. Remember him? He has a few questions for you."

She quickly pushed past Sanderson as he grabbed for her, only getting her jeans

just as Eversman hung out the front door, "Diana, your dad is on the phone."

With a smile she waved to Chris, "See you Monday."

Sanderson closed the Jeeps door, then asked the Doctor, "How long will Jordan have to take the medicine?"

Chris looked to Sanderson, surprised, as if he hadn't noticed him before. He quickly answered, "Until the prescription wears out. You live here too?"

Sanderson put his keys in his pocket.

Shoving his hands in them as well, "Yeah. With all our children."

Chris stared at him, "Our? I thought she was widowed?"

"She is."

Confused, Chris then asked, "Is she single?"

"Why? A rich handsome man like you should have a girlfriend. Or more."

Chris narrowed his eyes, he then asked, "Is there anything between you and Diana that I need to know about? Before I ask her out?"

"Yeah. I promised her husband I would look after her and the kids."

Chris nodded, "Well that's noble of you. You keep looking."

For just a moment Sanderson remained calm, collected.

Then he punched Chris right in the face.


	9. Chapter 9

"So….may I ask what possessed you to punch out my coworker? Or were you just bored?"

Sanderson rolled his eyes, then winced as Diana put his hand in a bag of ice.

All four kids watched from the kitchen doorway.

Harry too.

"Not that I'm complaining, he is a pain in the ass. And it was one of Hoot's hobbies, punching out the Doctors that annoyed me. And he was getting annoying. But we have to set a good example for the children or something."

Sanderson scrunched his face up, "Yeah. Well he was getting on my nerves. So you be the good example."

Diana cocked a eyebrow, "Hoot's moodiness too."

Sanderson stuck his tongue out, then lifted his hand from the bag of ice, looking at the reddened knuckles.

"Mom. Can Harry move up to my bedroom?"

"No Rachael. But you can move out to the kitchen."

Eversman pushed past the kids and Harry, making his way in the kitchen.

"What?" Sanderson asked.

Diana turned and looked at him, Eversman held out his hand, inside was a bloody tooth.

Diana looked to Sanderson in shock, "You knocked his tooth out?"

At that Eversman turned to the kids, "You see that. Fighting is bad."

Diana rolled her eyes, she looked to the kids, "Go upstairs. Now. I need a word with Jeff."

A gasp came from the children at the mention of Sanderson's name. Even Eversman looked nervously to Sanderson, who told him, "I'll be fine." With a look back to the clearly disappointed children, he spoke up, "Why don't I take the kids before World War 3 begins."

Diana glanced up as Sanderson glared at her, at Sanderson, then smiled at the kids, "Go with your Uncle Matt, he'll help you clip Harry's nails."

Confused for a moment, Eversman looked to Sanderson while the kids piled out towards the front door. On the way to the garage in the house next-door, Eversman's house.

"Who the hell is Harry?"

"The Chicken," Diana told Eversman, her icy glare never left Sanderson's head.

"Shit!" He swore, then ran after the kids to keep Harry out of his house.

No sooner had he left, Diana belted Sanderson upside his head, "You Knocked The Tooth Out Of My Coworker!"

"A minute ago you were glad!"

Again, she hit him, "You Knocked His $300 filling out! Do you know how long I will have to hear him bitch about this! I'll have to either pay him off or sleep with him now!"

With a groan Sanderson looked heavenwards, "Or quit."

Diana stormed across the kitchen, she opened the freezer door and took out some chicken. She slammed the door closed and grabbed a large metal pot from the ceiling. "We can't afford for me to _quit_."

He groaned again, then lifted his hand from the ice.

Diana pulled a knife from the cutting board, "Put you hand back."

He listened.

She then cut the plastic from the chicken and dropped it in the pot. "Between my widow's benefits and your paycheck, we were barely making ends meet. If I work five thirteen-hour shifts a week we should be able to get by. We have to think about college, cars, bills, accidents like Jordan's."

Sanderson's flexed his numb fingers.

Diana pointed the knife at him, "We can't afford for you to hurt your trigger finger."

He laughed inwardly, "Funny. You know I'm ambidextrous."

Diana was not amused, she began to hack at the guts frozen in the chicken with the knife. "Sanderson…I don't know how we're going to pay the bills until Daniel's old enough to go to school and I can work regular days. And he is _not_ going to daycare."

Sanderson drummed his good fingers on the kitchen counter.

Aware of how many bills there were, more then aware.

"Unless I take some details…..but I would be away from you guys for a few months at a time. But it's a lot of money really fast."

She shook her head, "I'm not telling you what to do. Don't get yourself killed just to pay bills. We'll figure something out. We have four kids and a chicken…we can put them to work. Right?"

Taking the bag of ice, Sanderson got up and walked across the kitchen, over to Diana. "It'll be fine."

She looked up at him with tired green eyes, "Lets just burn the bills and say we never got them."

He smirked, then took her chin in his good hand and kissed her forehead. He ran his hand over her cheek and looked down in her eyes. "Just don't burn the Cosmo."

Diana laughed and pushed him away.

With a smile he cried, "Come on! Don't you wanna know what your man is thinking of after sex?"

"No," she smiled.

"Well I do," Sanderson declared.

She pointed back to the dining room chair she had drug in from the kitchen, "Sit down and ice your hand."

Curious, Sanderson asked, "So, do you think Doctor man is handsome?"

A snort came from Diana.

"What's that mean?"

Diana looked up from hacking at the chicken, "He's not my type. I like a man in uniform. The next man I date will be a Marine."

Sanderson rolled his eyes, "We're a little far from a Marine Base."

She continued her hacking, "Then it will be a while."

Again Sanderson flexed his numb hand, "Why a Marine?"

Diana pulled out some frozen guts, "I'll be good and old. And will look good next to a black uniform. The way I figure it, all the kids will be grown and married, you'll be remarried. And I won't have to rely on my widow's benefits. I can't afford to get married and loose them."

"What if I'm not married?"

Diana looked up at him, "If you're not married, and I'm no where near a Marine Base. We could get married. So long as you have a lot of shiny pins on your uniform."

"No pressure though,"

"None," she smiled.

"Hoot was right," Sanderson muttered.

Diana glanced up, quietly asking, "How's that?"

"You are a pain in the ass."

At that she threw the frozen chicken guts at him. A row of half laughed swears came from Sanderson, as he picked them out of his hair and off his shirt. He got up and ran over to her. To his surprise she didn't run, instead she pulled out more frozen gizzards.

Sanderson snatched the frozen chicken from her hands. Then he mimicked the kids and stuck his tongue out at her.

"Give me my frozen chicken back! You big……stupid-head." She stammered, unable to think of anything else to say. Quoting her youngest daughter Rachael.

In a act of equal maturity, Sanderson tossed the chicken in the air like a basketball, "On one condition."

"I am not giving you a blowjob."

His eyes widened, "I didn't know that was a option. I'll remember that for Christmas though."

Diana flipped him off, "On our golden anniversary."

Thinking, Sanderson twirled the frozen chicken between his hands, "Ok. I'll give you your chicken back if you…….kiss me."

He never thought she would take him serious. Halfheartedly he had been joking.

When she stepped up to him, took his face between her hands and kissed him. It took his breath away. For just a moment he was too stunned to even realize what was happening.

For just a moment though, no longer.

Then his body reacted, he dropped the chicken and took her face in his hands, sliding his fingers in her hair and pulling her even closer.

The kiss was just as intense as she imagined or thought about before that moment.

Hoot had been the last man she had kissed in that way.

Before she realized it her hands traveled down, down over his chest. And then she realized what she was doing. She realized where her hands were traveling. Quickly she pulled them back and broke the kiss.

She looked into his blue eyes, "Like that?"

Breathless he nodded, "Ok. You can have your chicken back."


	10. Chapter 10

_Authors note, Ok I'll update my Hector and Andromache story later this week ok. I just quit my job so I'll have far more study/writing time. But I just got back from school and wanted to write something trashy. Enjoy and review!_

**A few days later….**

For three days Sanderson tried as hard as he could, but he couldn't get her kiss out of his head.

He couldn't stop thinking about the way her lips felt.

The way her hair felt between his fingers, or the she touched him. It was both curiously and possessively.

She was simply intoxicating.

It both drove him nuts and filled him with guilt.

While it made him feel things he hadn't felt since his wife died, he couldn't help but remind himself that it was Hoot's wife. It was as if he were in love with his best friends sister.

He could hardly sleep at night, he had trouble concentrating at work, and he took more cold showers then he had during his teenage years. When he fell asleep his dreams were full of things that made his teenage dreams seem tame.

Sanderson laid in bed and listened Diana go into the shower, he heard the water start and tried very hard not to think about who was in the shower, or what she looked like, wet and soapy.

He then scolded himself for thinking such a thing. But then he had the sudden though of going in the shower, then he sat up and scolded himself again.

"How the hell did he put up with her," Sanderson whispered to himself, he covered his eyes with his hand. Then listened as feet walked down the hall. Up to his door, and Jordan peeked in his father's bedroom, "Dad?"

"Yes my son," Sanderson asked.

"There's some old lady at the front door."

Sanderson sat up and looked at his son, "What does this old woman look like?"

Jordan thought really hard, "Ummmm…..old. White short hair. Blue eyes. She's dressed up like Martha Stewart. She's real bitchy."

Immediately Sanderson told Jordan, "I don't want to hear you swearing again. If I hear one more swear out of your mouth I'm gonna beat your ass."

He slid out of bed and followed his son out and into the hall in a pair of jeans.

Sanderson followed his son out into the living room, where he was shocked to see his mother.

She was seated on the couch.

Dressed in a business suit skirt seat. Her legs crossed, heels on. Her white hair was perfectly trimmed. Her blue eyes a shocking color just like Sanderson. Seated on the floor were the rest of the girls, painting Harry's toenails.

Sanderson could see the pure revulsion on her face, it made him happy.

At the sight of her son she stood up and held her hand out.

Sanderson looked at it, he never hugged his mother. Never once in his life. Not even as a child. His father was the warm and open one.

Sanderson shook his mothers hand.

His mother looked at the children. Then back to Sanderson, who sat down and asked, "What is it?"

Jordan took a seat beside his father on the couch. Curious who the woman was, the girls seated on the floor didn't even glance up at the woman. She looked once more at the children and then to Sanderson, hinting without words.

Finally Sanderson asked, "What is it? Or did you just come to say hi?"

The last time Sanderson had spoken to his mother was on his wedding night when she made it obvious that his wife, Humera, was not an acceptable choice for a wife.

They hadn't spoken since.

The last time Sanderson had spoken to his father was a week before.

Finally, his mother spoke up, she smoothed her hands over her skirt, "Jeffery. Your father and I, are getting a divorce."

Sanderson wasn't too surprised.

Beside him Jordan stared at the woman, he put two and two together, "Dad? Is she gramp's wife?"

Sanderson looked at his son, "Yeah."

Jordan looked at the woman a little closer, but he took his fathers hand. Inwardly Sanderson was a little upset. His parents had been married for forty years. But he knew his father wasn't happy. He knew his father had met another woman. He was glad his son took his hand.

His mother's eyes darted from the small hand that held Sanderson's back to Sanderson's eyes. She didn't look at any of the children again, instead she told Sanderson, "I've met a man."

Sanderson's eyebrows rose.

"We're engaged," she continued.

Jordan's eyes darted over at her left hand. Seeing the diamond on her finger, Sanderson also looked, and saw that at closer inspection the ring his mother used to wear had been replaced.

"In a few days I'm going down to some Godforsaken island in the Caribbean to get the marriage annulled. Then I am going home to Maine. I'd like you to walk me down the aisle."

Sanderson took a breath, he held his mothers eyes, "I've told you before. I am not changing my mind."

His mothers jaw twitched.

Her eyes then grew wide enough Sanderson was afraid they would fall from her head, he then heard Diana's voice behind him, "Sanderson, the showers acting funny again."

Sanderson glanced over his shoulder and almost died then and there, Diana stood there in no more then a white towel, the towel kept everything covered, but it wasn't large enough for him.

Beside the fact she was wet and soapy.

Jordan turned around in his seat, "Did you swear at it?"

Diana nodded, "That was the first thing I did little man."

Sanderson couldn't help but stare. Her hair hung around her face in strands. She wasn't stick thin. But she was not fat by far. She looked every bit like a woman.

Quickly he stood, he looked to his mother, "You know my answer. If you want, stay for breakfast. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Rachael looked up at her mother, "Mom. Do you have any clear nail polish for Harry? I don't want the paint to chip."

Diana thought about the question, while Sanderson walked briskly past her, she looked to the woman. "I'll bring some out sweetie. Why don't you see if our guest would like something to drink?"


	11. Chapter 11

_Authors note, Ok so I am being creative here. So, bear with me people. This is the product of my creative juices. Watch out! _

**Upstairs….**

Diana watched as Sanderson attempted to fix the leaky showerhead that leaked more then it sprayed water.

She knew exactly what was wrong with the man.

She had seen the pissed off face that he had many times before, just not on him. It didn't really surprise her that he could be so easily upset. Infact she was a little relived.

Sanderson kept his temper and what he felt inside. Which she knew was professional and kept him alive at work. She was glad to see him finally react to something. Neutrally she asked, "That woman….she's your mother?"

Sanderson glanced at her from in the shower, "Yeah. Jordan tell you?"

Diana shook her head, "No. I've only seen guys get that pissed off when a parent is involved."

She watched him mutter under his breath, something she had never seen him do before, and then turn back to the showerhead. Diana crossed her arms over her soapy chest and walked over to the shower stall and leaned on the wall beside the open door. Peeking inside she patiently prodded, "What does she want?"

With a grunt while he tightened a nut with a wrench, he muttered again, "She's getting married."

"That's not what's pissing you off," Diana told him.

Annoyed with her he turned, "Why do you care?" Before his wife, Humera, just let him stew. Let him work whatever it was out on his own. Diana was very different from Humera, it was beginning to annoy him.

She didn't move or back down, instead she met his annoyance head on, "I didn't put up with Hoot's moodiness, you think I'm putting up with your shit? If you want to brew, fine, I don't care, just don't do it around me or the kids, got it?"

Her answer slightly surprised him, slightly annoyed him.

At that Diana stood up straight, "I'll be next door with the kids." She snatched her robe from the back of the door and pulled it on, tied it, then pulled the towel out from under it.

He heard her walk down the hall and inwardly he felt like shit. "Dammit," he softly muttered to himself. She was one person he didn't want to and couldn't afford to anger and alienate.

He listened as Diana gave orders for the kids to go get their book bags.

He listened as they headed next door so she could shower before she drove them to the bus stop.

Quickly he set to fixing the shower head. It was at that moment he remembered the horror stories Hoot told him about Diana's temper. Unlike Hoot, Sanderson did not want to toy with her or see how angry he could get her, he seriously doubted if he and Diana fought it would end up in the bedroom.

**Ten minutes later…..**

Sanderson made his way across the small lawn that lay between his and Eversman's houses.

The houses were pretty much the same in set up and design.

He picked up his niece's bicycle and set it against the house wall, he walked in through the garage into the kitchen. A total of five grade scholars and two extremely young toddlers were keeping Eversman company.

Sanderson immediately went to Daniel and picked the baby up out of the playpen, where his other niece slept. At the sight of Sanderson the baby cooed, a smile came over Daniel's face. The baby grabbed his ear and began to suck on Sanderson's shirt.

"Hey man, congratulations on pissing Diana off. Nice job. Hoot would be proud." Eversman teased, in the middle of eating waffles.

Both Robin and Rachael looked up, from Eversman to Sanderson, Rachael looked to her sister who stood up from her backpack. They had been getting their school stuff ready.

"You and mommy are fighting?"

Sanderson looked down at Robin, "No sweetie, we just had a small argument." Robin's face filled with fear that killed a part of Sanderson. In a frightened voice she told him, "But, mommy and daddy would have made up in bed by now. You're not moving away are you?"

Eversman quickly spoke up, "Don't worry Rob. Sanderson and your mommy aren't married so it doesn't count. They are like best friends, like your daddy and Sanderson, and remember how much daddy and Sanderson argued? It just made them better friends."

Robin looked to Sanderson, who assured her, "Sweetie I'll go right down the hall and apologize to your mother. Ok?"

Robin thought about it, then nodded, "Ok."

Baby on his hip, he made his way down the hall. While Daniel gnawed on his shirt he rubbed the infants back. He always held and spoiled his children when they were babies. Daniel was no exception. He saw the little boy as his own.

As he turned the corner of the hall he could hear Jamie and Diana talking.

It stopped him dead in his tracks.

It made Daniel perk up at the sound of his mother's voice, and then look up curiously at Sanderson.

Diana's upset voice, which was past the verge of tears whispered heartbrokenly to Jamie, "I can't keep this up! I can't. I'm not gonna make it to old age Jamie."

"Diana please, maybe its, maybe its not part of the grief?"

With a sob Diana cried, "No. I can't. No. I can't stop thinking about Hoot, I can't get him out of my head, and I'll love him forever. He was everything to me. But then, I can't get Sanderson out my head either. He helped more then he knows after Hoot died. He still does. He makes me laugh, he makes me feel safe, and I can't stop thinking dirty things. And then I feel guilty because I am starting to feel it more often. I think I'm falling in love with him, but I can't."

"Diana, maybe, maybe this not grief? Maybe you're moving on?"

With a wail Diana began to cry harder, "I don't want to move on from Hoot. But I don't want to be just _stuck_ in the past. And what if it is the grief and we screw up what we already have? What will happen then?"

For a moment Jamie was quiet, Sanderson listened for the sound of feet, but then heard his sister, "What if you and Sanderson fall in love? Maybe it will work out perfectly?"

"No. I don't even know if he thinks about me the same way. I can't. We can't. I can control myself. I can ignore this, I can fight it. I have to worry about the kids."

"Diana, sweetie, if you're gonna say that, at least sound believable. You sound as determined as a recovering druggie in Amsterdam."

With a sob Diana fell apart, "What did I do to deserve this? I could handle loosing Hoot. I have the children. I have his brother. But I can't handle falling in love with his best friend."


	12. Chapter 12

_Author's Note, Aha! People do read this! Ok, so I am rewriting the last two chapters. I want it to be believable as possible, ha-ha. Thank you Ms. Super-six-one. :) I did not know that. Since my basement got flooded earlier today, and I spent 3 hours vacuuming up the water, I had some muses! Enjoy!_

It had been a really bad day for Sanderson.

Not a little bad.

Or kinda bad.

But _super_ bad.

It usually worked that way with Sanderson, he had gotten used to it. He was ready to kiss his kids goodbye for almost a month, he was even ready to say bye to Diana for almost a month. When he found out Diana would be joining him for the little trip.

At that he stormed to his boss's office.

Down the hall with plain walls.

There was a clean smell of the chemicals used to clean the floor.

While Sanderson knew his boss was in a meet with three new Delta's, he didn't care.

Everyone who knew him, and saw the look on his face, moved out of his way.

No one dared stop him when he opened the door of his boss's office, and stormed right in. His boss promptly stopped talking. The three new recruits looked up at Sanderson, who immediately demanded, "What the hell are you doing!"

His boss, Robinson, a older middle-aged black man, a very calm and composed man, was shocked. He was not a man who used profanity, "Jeff, language."

"You wanna hear language? I will give you fucking language! I will give you so much fucking language you won't know what the hell hit you! Now is NOT the time to be correcting me! Did you not think I wouldn't notice her on the plane? Or her bags at the house? How stupid do you think I am? She is _not_ going! No way. You better find someone else!"

Knowing he wouldn't get rid of Sanderson, he looked to the three men, "Would you give us a minute."

"We're going to need more then a fucking minute," Sanderson spat.

The three men got up and walked out of the office.

Which had absolutely no personality.

No pictures on the walls, no awards or plaques.

The furniture was standard.

Not even a plant.

Almost clinical.

Sanderson didn't bother to take a seat, Robinson didn't ask him to sit down. He had worked with Sanderson for years. He knew Sanderson inside and out, he knew Sanderson was not going to be happy when he signed off on the form. He had even expected Sanderson to come storming to his office.

Once the door shut, Sanderson exploded, "_You Can't Send Her Along Too! There Are Other Medics You Can Send!_"

Robinson slid a folder to Sanderson, who snatched it and opened it up. "It's not up to me. I do not pick and choose the medical personnel. She was specially selected for this, Sanderson."

Sanderson looked over the forms, the letterhead had the insignia of Diana's corporation. A company that trained medical personnel for the military. She had worked with the company for years. Sanderson recognized the letterhead from the monthly check she got. He read the letter, which was nothing more then a request from a Dr. Wood, requesting a doctor Sanderson knew well and Diana to be shipped over to work with him, until the mission was complete.

Sanderson flipped the paper over and saw the request granted form.

Finally, he came to the paper full of signatures.

Robinson watched as Sanderson slowly brewed. Until the well trained Delta all but threw the file at his boss. "_You knew when we moved in together, this is exactly why we did that! How the **hell** is my sister supposed to watch **all** the kids? We moved in together so this **wouldn't** happen!_"

"Jeff, I know your upset," Robinson began, but Sanderson cut him off, "No! you don't! So don't start the psychological bullshit! You put your career over my personal life!"

It wasn't that Sanderson dared accuse him of it, but it was true.

Robinson fell silent for a few minutes.

Knowing Sanderson knew he had sold his friend out. Knowing Sanderson knew he had put his career over Sanderson's personal life.

It made him feel like dirt.

Quietly, without meeting Sanderson's eyes he asked, "You know?"

It was then Sanderson dropped into one of the chairs.

The kind with a metal frame. The cloth seating. The really uncomfortable kind.

"Yeah. Don't worry, I am coming home. I'll kill all the bad men. You'll get your promotion." Sanderson spat, more then a little pissed off.

Robinson looked over his desk, over the paperwork, the files, the pens. All kept in perfect order. Nothing was ever out of place. He was always a perfectionist. Ever since childhood.

"Look, Jeff," he began.

Sanderson cut him off, "I'm not stupid. Just because I don't sit behind a desk doesn't mean I don't understand office politics. If the mission you put together is successful, you get a prize. A nicer office. Bigger desk. Even a bigger paycheck."

There was nothing Robinson could say in his defense. Nothing at all. Nothing that would fix what he had done to his friend. Nothing that would make it better.

So Sanderson got up and walked to the door, he opened it before Robinson said, "Jeff?"

Sanderson looked over his shoulder and lifted a eyebrow.

For a second Robinson was going to apologize. When he saw his fellow coworkers in the hall, he nailed the last nail in the coffin when he instead said, "You have to go see Dr. Moss before you go."

At that, Sanderson slammed the door.

With a glare at the ranking men who stood behind him, daring them to speak. He made it five steps outside the door, when the stairwell door to his left flung open.

A irate Diana stepped out, as angry as Sanderson, but far more vocal. She looked around and spotted the uniformed men. With no shame or thought of her actions, she stormed over to them, still in her scrubs.

Her bloody scrubs.

Her dark hair hung down around her face, her green eyes glowed with rage.

Sanderson froze, he made no move to stop her, but watched.

Diana thrust her index finger at the men, then demanded, "Which one of you is Carl Robinson!"

The men shared looks of concern.

Sanderson then decided to take her outside before she got in trouble.

He walked to her and took her elbow, Diana turned and saw him. She then began to shriek, "Do you know where you're going!"

As he pulled her down the hall, he quietly answered, "Yeah."

She let Sanderson pull her towards the elevator, while she ranted, drawing looks from all around. "Who will watch the kids? Is he going to watch our kids? Your sister can't watch seven kids! She'll go nuts! I can't stand our kids sometimes and I'm demented. Where the hell is the Robinson man? Lets ship the kids over to his house!"

When Sanderson saw the elevator, Diana was then thrown into another fit, "And what's with seeing a fucking shrink! What the hell for? The last shrink I saw prescribed me Prozac! The stupid bitch said I was depressed! I was grieving for my husband, of course I was depressed! I am ** not** seeing another shrink!"

Sanderson jammed the button and held onto Diana, "If I have to see the shrink, you have to see the shrink."

He looked at her and watched her explode.

Her green eyes widened as she lost it, then and there.

With a few people around, waiting to get on the elevator, Diana lost it. She just let out a scream that she had kept bottled up inside. A scream filled with all the emotions, pain, and anger she kept inside.

With a _,ding,_ the elevator doors opened.

Sanderson stepped inside with Diana behind him, no longer screaming.

No one else stepped onto the elevator.

So he hit the button for the bottom floor, and then looked over at her, "Feel better?"

Diana slumped against the elevator wall, she looked at him as the doors closed, "Yeah. I do feel a little better."

Neither of them looked away.

Unable to look away, both moved at the same time, it was mutual. They both moved toward one another without a second thought. Diana took his face in her hands as he kissed her, the kiss was just as consuming as their first. His hands moved down around her waist, pulling her to him the rest of the way. So there was no space between them.

His fingers found their way in her hair. Feeling the soft texture of it, while his other arm was wrapped around her back, holding her close.

It was a closeness neither had felt in close to a year.

She rose onto her toes and pushed him back into the elevator wall, her lips never left his. The kiss may have slowed, or even stopped, but she never took her lips from his. She pulled him even closer. Enjoying the touch and being touched. The way he responded told her he felt the same, it told her just how he felt. It both frightened and thrilled her to no end.

The elevator came to a stop.

Sanderson's arm shot out, he broke the kiss and hit the elevator stop button. When the doors didn't open, he looked back at Diana. He noticed how green her eyes were with her so close, pressed between her body and the elevator wall.

Diana traced her thumbs over his clean-shaven face.

Then she met his blue eyes, finding the confused and intense emotions that she felt in his eyes.

Before she could say anything, he kissed her again.

Every last voice in his head was telling him how wrong it was, how morally wrong it was, and to stop. Telling him he couldn't do it to his wife and Hoot. But he could not stop himself. He could not stop touching her, kissing her. When she returned his kisses with equal fervor, he couldn't be convinced of anything that would make him stop.

When her tongue brushed his, a wave of heat coursed through his body with a intensity that almost brought him to his knees.

Nothing compared to the feelings she made him feel at that moment. Not even during his entire teenage years. The years when any form of petting was seen as a gift from God.

The kisses he returned were anything but innocent, which was what she didn't want. She wanted him. She wanted the man, not a boy. She wanted to feel what he made her feel when he kissed her. The desperate yet intense and almost hungry way he touched her thrilled her, it excited her.

When he touched her, he touched her in a way they both needed. He wasn't afraid of her body. Which was what she had loved about Hoot. After him, she didn't want someone who she would have to teach and mold, she wanted a partner.

Physically, she was more then ready for a new partner, they both were and knew it. But emotionally, neither of them were sure. But, they both knew it. When she broke the kiss, he dropped his forehead to hers and took a breath.

In a ragged voice, he whispered, "What…what are we doing?"

She shook her head, "I don't know."

Softly, he kissed her, then spoke against her lips, "Ok. Well, if you figure out what we're doing, just let me know. Cause I'm…I'm curious."

She grew annoyed, and began to pull away. But Sanderson pulled her back to him. He quietly begged, "Don't shut me out….or pull away from me. I can't handle loosing you too."

Emotion clouded her eyes.

Then, she kissed him, deeply. Just as the elevator doors _ dinged_, before Sanderson even thought to his the button again, a round, white, plucky woman walked in the elevator. At the sight of them she snorted, "Excuse me."

Diana pulled away from Sanderson, angered once again, she began to rage, "_What is your problem woman! Do you mind…_"

Sanderson looped his arm around her waist and drug her from the elevator.


	13. Chapter 13

Sanderson had dropped the five kids off with Jamie, who had extorted close to fifty dollars plus pizza money, all so he and Diana could go to get their Psyche exams.

He met Diana in the office.

It was an office that made him feel weird.

Since he spent quite a bit of time with Hoot, he was used to being Psychologically analyzed. Since he was a Special Forces soldier, he usually had to be examined to make sure he was still able to handle the job. He'd been at the same job for close to fifteen years.

Sanderson walked into the beige walled and floored room. The colors were meant to calm he had heard, but they gave him the creeps.

The pictures of nature matched perfectly.

Too perfectly.

The furniture was always new. Cream colored sofas and chairs. Wooden tables that were never scratched. New magazines. Always new. Any magazine you could want to read, except porn.

There were two doors in the waiting room.

One coming in from the hall and one going out.

There was no receptionist. When the Doctor was ready, he or she would come out and call your name. Sanderson was always convinced there were cameras in the room. Although he could never find one.

There were four people in the waiting room.

An Asian lady named Marian that Sanderson had seen around the base. A dark haired man that had a temper. At the sight of Sanderson the man lifted his eyebrows, Sanderson returned the gesture, and the man went back to his Sports Illustrated.

On the sofa, by the picture of the Grand Canyon, Diana sat beside Lambross. At the sight of Sanderson, Diana immediately perked up. But then, she tried to be casual. Tried to remain calm. Knowing Lambross could sense sex if the word was thought a mile away.

He glanced up and saw Sanderson, "Jeff. Who're you here to see?"

"You're in my seat," Sanderson told his friend, who looked to Diana. Then back to Sanderson, "I got here first man."

"I have seniority," Sanderson countered, then added, "Don't make me pull a gun on you in the Psyche Ward."

Annoyed, Lambross threw his feet down on the floor, he stomped over to an empty leather plush chair. "God! You sound like my mother!"

Diana crossed her legs and scooted over.

As Sanderson sat down she asked, "The kids?"

"Are with Jamie, she has my paycheck." He finished. He looked over at Lambross, who was on his team, "Why are you here? Shouldn't you be at home with your wife?"

The Greek nodded, "Yeah, she's looking at a adoption catalogue. We both have to be psychologically cleared to adopt. It's my turn."

Diana ignored both men.

She slumped against Sanderson, something she had done many times before, so it was not out of the ordinary. Infact, she knew if she suddenly became frigid, and refused to touch Sanderson, Lambross would know something was wrong.

Her green eyes looked at the magazines. She refused to touch them. She knew there were cameras hidden. So the people behind the doors could watch. Watch their patients in their _natural behavior_. The waiting room always made her feel like a animal on display.

So she stayed still, slumped against Sanderson, while he and Lambross argued over nothing.

When the door opened only Diana looked up.

To see the plucky white women from earlier in the elevator, the woman wore khaki pants, a floral print top, her glasses had thick frames. She looked at her clipboard and called out, "Mrs. Diana Gibson?"

Diana grabbed Sanderson's arm and hissed, "I am not going in there alone. I hate shrinks."

He nodded, "Ok. I'll come too."

Diana stood and waited for Sanderson to tell Lambross something, he then waved to the dark haired man, "See you tonight."

The man saluted Sanderson, then looked down at his magazine.

Diana gave Sanderson a look, he gave her back a gentle push towards the woman, whispering, "That's Earl. The new man on my team."

The plucky woman watched both Diana and Sanderson, when they got to the door she told them, "Mrs. Gibson, I'll need to speak to you alone."

Diana narrowed her eyes at the woman, the gesture intimidated the woman enough she stepped back, but once she realized it she stood up straight. But it was too late. The damaged had been done.

Diana then told the woman, "The last time I had to come done to the nut house, you people tried to put me on Prozac. You people also sent me to sensitivity training and grief counseling. There's no way in hell I am sitting alone with you people again. He comes in or I go."

The woman knew she was not going to win from Diana's tone. And her file. So she looked to Sanderson, "And you would be Jeffery Sanderson?"

It had been a long day, annoyed, Sanderson met the woman's eyes, "Moss?"

She nodded, "Dr. Moss."

Diana rolled her eyes and looked heavenwards.

Sanderson pointed to the files in her hand, "Don't tell me my picture is not in that stack of files."

Moss was unsure of what to say to the two.

"Which door is it and we'll meet you there," Sanderson told her.

Moss stepped back and pointed down the similar hall, "Third door on the right."

At that, Diana led the way down the hall. Sanderson behind her while the Dr watched the two. While some of her immediate assumptions on her two new patients were correct. Both had surprised her. She watched as Diana lead the way, walked into the room and Sanderson close the door behind them. She then went to go get his file.

In the room, Diana looked around.

All the furniture was oak.

The huge desk. The bookshelf. The couch and chair, which had red cushions.

A stereotypical Psychiatrist office.

Diana looked to Sanderson, who asked, "You think the room is wired?"

She nodded, "Yeah," then she walked to the only window, which overlooked the parking lot, and opened it.

With a grin Sanderson dropped down on the sofa.

Knowing full well that the open window would fill the recorders with static. Knowledge from experience.

He watched Diana walk over to the woman's desk and take a seat. He watched her flip open the calendar, then flip through it. When she didn't see anything particularly interesting, Diana closed it. She looked over the messy desk. Spotting a notepad, with her name on it, Sanderson's as well. Diana grabbed it and looked over the writing.

She then lowered it and looked to Sanderson, who lifted his eyebrows curiously.

"Am I volatile?"

He shook his head, "Not you. You're just misunderstood."

Happy with his answer, she looked over the pad. Then dropped it and got up. She traced her fingertips over the desk as she made her way over to Sanderson. She dropped down beside him.

Then pulled her legs up underneath her, leaning against his side.

Taking comfort in him just being there.

Sanderson put his arm behind her and began to rub her back, just slow gentle circles.

It calmed her nerves.

Which helped when the door opened and Dr. Moss walked in the room.

File less.

She looked at both Diana and Sanderson, who didn't seem to notice the woman. She took a particular interest in the body language between the two.

There was no personal space between the two.

Diana leant completely against Sanderson's side, her head rested upon his shoulder while he whispered against her hair, his hand behind her back.

She had read the files on them both and knew they were both widows. She knew they were close friends before they moved in together. But, out of all the books she had read and studied about couples, intimacy, even love. She hadn't ever seen it up close. Outside of a case study. Dr. Moss had no time for love or even intimacy with her career.

She walked to her desk to see what Diana had touched.

While Diana didn't even look at her, Sanderson's blue eyes followed Dr. Moss around the room.

Satisfied, Dr. Moss then took a seat at her desk.

She cleared her throat, Diana looked up at her while Sanderson's gaze remained as intense as ever. For the first time in her professional career, she felt uncomfortable. So she quickly asked, "You two live together? Correct?"

Diana nodded, while Sanderson lifted his head, "Yeah."

"And how long have you been sexually active," she asked.

Both of them were confused, so she elaborated, "Together."

At that Sanderson shook his head, "We're not sleeping together."

Dr. Moss smiled like you would smile to a child, "There is no reason to lie. We're all adults."

Tired, Diana rubbed her face, "No lady, seriously, we're not sleeping together."

Patiently, Dr. Moss asked, "What about earlier today? In the elevator? That was pretty intense."

Diana looked up at Sanderson, so Dr. Moss couldn't see and mouthed, _virgin_. He smiled and then to Dr. Moss, "That was kissing. Not foreplay."

With raised eyebrows, she looked down and wrote something on her pad.

Diana checked her watch, which prompted Dr. Moss to ask, "Do you have somewhere to be?"

Diana laughed, she laughed and shook her head, "Oh sweetheart. You're so innocent."

While Sanderson smiled, Dr. Moss asked, "Beg Pardon?"

Diana patted Sanderson's legs, until he cross his one leg over the other, which provided Diana with a headrest. As she situated herself she told Dr. Moss, "I was up at four with a vomiting child. I went to work for twelve hours. Helped write two papers and do Algebra, which between you and me, probably isn't correct. Not to mention I have to pack. Put a splint on the wing of a chicken. And clean up the house. So, I'm gonna lay down and let Sanderson answer your questions."

Stunned, she watched Diana lay down, length wise on the couch, then put her head in Sanderson's lap.

She looked to Sanderson, who shrugged, "It doesn't matter. The both of us are going regardless of what you say. Robinson will overrule your analysis anyway. Poke and prod, do what you want. I really don't care."


	14. Chapter 14

It was close to midnight when Sanderson heard his beeper go off.

Over the years he had become sensitive to any noise at night. Whether it be gunfire, a beeper, or a child crying. He heard everything at night. Every last noise.

Wide-awake, he rolled across the queen size bed he slept in, and grabbed the beeper.

He knew the number by heart.

Beside him a small body moved, woken by Sanderson's movement, "Dad?"

Earlier that night a storm had rolled in, both Jordan and Alexandria ran into their father's room and climbed in bed with him. Diana's daughters however went to their window to watch the storm.

"It's all right, go back to sleep son," Sanderson told his son, patting his son's sleepy head. He watched Jordan lay his head back down on his pillow from his room. Beside him his sister lay curled up in a ball, wrapped up in the quilt from her bed.

Sanderson watched both his children fall asleep.

In the occasional lightning strike he could see his son's sleeping face, so peaceful and innocent. He could see the ocean of dark hair that covered his daughter's side and her pillow.

Once he was positive they were asleep he reached for his cell phone, but lay back down while he dialed in the number. Wanting to see as much of his children while he had the chance. The voice of one of his commanding officers came over the line, telling him where to go, immediately, in less then five words.

At the end of the brief call, Sanderson hung up.

Again, he looked over his two sleeping children.

He stayed in bed and watched them sleep for a few minutes. Only then he slid from the bed without waking the two children. Half dressed already, Sanderson went to his dresser, grabbed an olive shirt and pulled it on. He shoved his wallet in his jeans pocket. Then quickly slid his feet in a pair of sneakers and laced them up.

Before he left his bedroom he kissed both his children goodbye, making a point of it.

Then he went down the hall to the bedroom where the kids lived. He peeked in and saw both Rachael and Robin at the windowsill.

"Hey," he whispered.

Both girls jumped as if they had been shot.

Sanderson walked in the bedroom all four kids shared. He ushered the to girls away from the window and quickly shut it, then locked it.

While Robin obediently climbed into bed, Rachael looked up at Sanderson curiously, "Why are you dressed?"

Giving her a push towards her bed, he told her, "I have to go into work."

Rachael stopped dead in her tracks, "You're leaving?"

Across the dark room Robin spat, suddenly angry, "No stupid, he has to go get briefed."

Sanderson picked up Rachael and carried the little girl to her bed, he considered his daughter as much as his own. "Don't call you sister stupid, Robin." He gently dropped Rachael in her bed and pulled the blankets playfully over her head while he gave Robin an authoritive look.

A streak of lightning lite up the room, showing the tears streaming down her young face.

As Rachael pulled the blankets off her head, Sanderson leaned over and kissed the top of her head, "Go to sleep, I'll see you in the morning." With an exaggerated sigh she griped, "All right!"

Sanderson then got up and made his way across the toy littered room. With four kids in the room they no longer cared about keeping it clean. Just disease free.

He went to Robin's bed and sat down of the side.

Immediately she sat up and hugged him. She clung to him, terrified. He put an arm lightly across her back, and smoothed her head with the other. "Sweetie, I'm not going anywhere yet. Just a meeting."

But the tears didn't stop.

Sanderson felt hot tears sink into the soft t-shirt. He held her closer and slowly rocked her. Not caring if he was going to be late. He kissed the top of her head, "It's ok sweetie. I won't be gone longer then a month."

Those words didn't help, part of him knew they wouldn't. So he simply sat there, held her, and rocked her until she fell asleep.

Close to twenty minutes later he laid her down in her bed, pulled the blankets over her, and kissed her temple.

He waved goodnight to Rachael, then quietly walked out of the bedroom.

Down the hall, and into the nursery, where Diana slept on an air mattress beside the crib.

Sanderson checked on Daniel, who was asleep. Then looked down at Diana, who looked as if she had just passed out from sheer exhaustion.

Without waking her, Sanderson stepped over the air mattress, then knelt down beside Diana, softly shaking her arm. The reaction was immediate. Diana snapped awake, just as her daughters had, looking around the room to see what was wrong.

At the sight of Sanderson, dressed, she knew.

Running a hand through her messy hair she sat up, "What's wrong?"

Sanderson couldn't help it, he reached out and touched her face. Feeling the warm soft skin of her cheek. "I have to go get briefed. Something changed so…I'll see you in the morning."

She didn't press his for more information. Knowing he didn't know any more then she did. Instead she reached up and took his face and softly kissed him before she let go.

**Almost an hour later…..**

Sanderson finally arrived in the simple small conference room, which was also served as a classroom. Because of it's prime location.

It was in a secure part of the base.

And it had a dry erase board.

Sanderson was the last one to walk into the room. Which had basic white walls, linoleum floors, and florescent lights.

He was the last to arrive, but no one said a word or even gave him a dirty look. Most of them felt the same, were going through the same stuff, or had been woken up at a god-forsaken hour and were trying to wake up.

Every seat at the three tables were full but one, which Sanderson took.

Once the door closed behind Sanderson, the man who had beeped him, the man Sanderson had called, he began to speak. He was a middle aged Vietnamese man in simple clothes. Jeans, a grey **Army** shirt, his leather jacket on a table. The reason why he was not in the field was evident when he walked, on a prosthetic leg.

His hair was cut in a regular short boy cut. Clean-shaven.

He was all business, he had already written out coordinates the man would need to know. Which they had already written down, including Sanderson as soon as he saw them.

"Two hours ago, our camp was attacked. Radio contact is gone. Satellite photo's show the camp is decimated. We don't know who is responsible, we may even be dealing with a traitor. Three Delta teams are being sent out from air, the Navy is sending three teams in too. Secure the camp, Recover as many men and women as you can…"

Sanderson took all the notes he needed, like he always did. He added some of his own. Comments. Even things to remember to bring. When Mark finished briefing them someone raised their hand and asked, "When do we leave?"

Smoothly, Mark crossed his arms, standing at attention, "I want you guys in the air within five hours. Soon as possible. Five hours, three, one, now, yesterday. Do what you have to do, pack, and rendezvous here." Pointing to a location on the board.

The men took some notes.

Mark looked around, seeing no more questions he said, "Sanderson, I need a word."

While the other men quickly got their stuff and left. Not because Mark wanted a word with Sanderson. But, the sooner they left, the sooner they could pack, the sooner they could be in the air.

Sanderson stayed seated while Mark walked over to him, he took a seat on the table. Sanderson never gave Mark special treatment, knowing Mark would kill him if he did. Mark had worked hard for the respect he had, he knew all the Deltas. Not just by file, but before he had lost his leg, he had worked with them, Sanderson especially.

Getting comfortable on the tabletop, he asked, "So tell me, why are you intentionally flaming Psych Exams? That's not your style. You usually tell them exactly what they want to hear, or screw with their minds. And, don't B.S. me ok, I will pull your ass out if I think you're a danger to the men. You've been at this job a while, are you burning out?"

Sanderson stretched out.

He crossed his arms over his chest, then slouched down. Relaxing somewhat. "I didn't want her to go."

Mark looked down at Sanderson's sneakers, not enviously, but because he knew Sanderson would not meet his eye. "Well, now, no one but you boys are going…may I ask why?"

"What do you mean?" Sanderson asked, feeling more comfortable speaking to Mark then any shrink over his entire career.

Mark sighed, then he looked over his shoulder at Sanderson, just to see the mans expression. "Did you not want her to go because of the children? Because she's your friend and you don't want to be distracted by her safety? Because you still feel guilty about Hoot? What? Give me a reason."

For a moment Sanderson was quiet.

Not because he didn't trust Mark, but because he had to think. Finally Sanderson said, "She's getting to me the way she got to Hoot."

"Well….she's certainly a handful. She's very different from Humera," Mark observed.

"I know," Sanderson muttered. He then asked, "What do you think?"

Sanderson finally met Mark's eyes.

"I think….I would not want to be in your shoes."

Sanderson then said, "You fell in love with your best friend, and are still married."

Mark nodded, knowing what Sanderson was asking without the words, so he told him, "Tread carefully. Slowly. Remember she was married to Hoot, which means she is a handful. She's the daughter of McKnight, which means she's going to be slightly psychotic. Since she is a mother, she's going to be like a….grizzly bear. She's different from your first wife, ok, just make sure its real. That its not just because you're both grieving and living under the same roof."

Quietly Sanderson swore, "Damn. I didn't even think of that."


	15. Chapter 15

It had been pure madness.

Diana had managed to feed, clothe, and bathe all five kids, drop four of them off at school and one off at Sanderson's sisters house. She then got gas and ran to the Commissary for laundry detergent and bleach.

Then, she sped across the base to the hospital.

Where she parked in a Doctors reserved spot and ran inside, almost two hours late. She quickly ran to clock in and found the receptionist at the E.R. had clocked her in two hours ago. Grateful, Diana slipped her a twenty and quickly ran out onto the floor.

She had been at work a whole ten minutes, when over the intercom Keira, the receptionist paged her, "Diana Gibson, would you come to the front please, you have a phone call."

After a quick check of the patient list, finding it had been a slow day. Then seeing the Doctor asleep on one of the stretchers, Diana ran to the front.

Passing the nurses lounge, where the four nurses and Dr. Chris Dockery were watching an American Movie on Pay-per-view.

Diana ran up front, where the young woman, with very short cut hair, a shade of bright blue sat, reading the latest issue of "**Hello**."

With a black nail she pointed to the phone, "Line three, it's what's his face."

Curious, Diana grabbed the phone, but didn't hit the line three button, "I know a lot of what's his faces."

Keria thought harder, "It's that dude you're living with. The one with the two Arabian kids……I can't remember his name. Tall….with a tight ass though."

Diana hit the line three button, "Sanderson?"

Keira clapped, "That's his name!"

Diana ignored her, relief filled her when she heard Sanderson's voice come over the line, "Hey. I'm here, safe and in one piece."

Habitually, Diana ran a hand through her hair, "Did you just land?"

"No…" Sanderson began to say, but Diana cut him off, "No? Don't you know how to use a phone? You pick up the receiver and punch in numbers!"

Keira gave her a thumbs up, "You tell him girl."

"Good God woman, what is your problem? Is there a problem over there? What's wrong? Hoot went days before he called you."

Diana swallowed and looked around the almost empty waiting reception area.

Only Keira was there, she took the hint and grabbed her coffee mug. Heading off to the break room for more tea.

Diana collapsed against the counter, sliding down against it, onto the floor.

"Diana," Sanderson asked, worried.

"No. Nothings wrong. It's just…..different now."

There was a pause, then he agreed, "I know. I would have called sooner, but it took me a while to track down a phone. I'm not as intimidating as Hoot apparently. It takes me a little longer to track down banned goods."

With her bottom on the cold floor, Diana told him, "Ok. I was just worried. I don't want you to get hurt too. I can't handle loosing anymore people I love."

Sanderson's heart jumped, but he remained calm.

He assured her like he assured his children, "I'll be fine."

Annoyed, Diana told him, "I'm not ten ok? I know how the military works. _I'll be fine_, really means, I'm ducking bullets and praying for the best."

A noise made Diana look up, Dr. Chris Dockery walked into the reception area, seeing Diana he tapped his watch. Diana flipped him off.

Chris then spat, "No personal calls on business hours!"

Thousands of miles away, Sanderson heard the voice of the handsome rich Doctor. He then heard Diana threaten to beat him with her tire iron if he touched the phone. A swell of annoyance filled him toward the good doctor. "Diana," he asked.

"Hold on," she told him, then covered the bottom part of the receiver with her hand.

Sanderson waited a moment and then the line went dead.

He stared at the cell phone he had borrowed, more then a little pissed off, "I am so kicking his ass when I get home."

**Five days later……**

All four kids were in bed with Diana when the phone rang.

Curled up against her asleep.

Diana had been asleep too, however, she had Daniel asleep on her chest. Alexandria curled up beside her, while Rachael lay, snoring.

When the phone rang Diana immediately grabbed it, half asleep she moaned, "Yo?"

"Yo? What the hell kinda greeting is that? You is supposed to be a responsible adult, woman. What other bad English you teachin my children?"

Slowly Diana woke, but not fast enough, "Who is this?"

"Albert. Yo brotha-in-law. Where the hell you be at?"

Diana thought about the name, "Albert?"

"Hoot's brotha?"

"Oh! Albert. What are you doing? What's wrong?" It suddenly registered for Diana.

"Good God woman! You forget bout me already! Damn!"

"Yeah yeah yeah. What's up Albert?"

"A'ight girl. Momma wants ta see her gran'chillin. Now I know you gots ta stay on the base an all. Since ya have all them lil ones ta watch, but momma wants ta come over, so ya mind?"

Hearing the heavy southern twang brought a feeling of grief to Diana. Hoot's accent was nowhere near as thick as his brothers, but was still thick. Quietly she told Albert, "No. I don't mind. When does she want to come visit?"

"A'ight. How bout in a week for a few weeks? I gotta get the tickets."

Diana nodded, "Ok."

"A'ight. I call ya when I get tha tickets. A'ight?"

"Ok. Sounds good. Are you gonna come too? The kids would love to see you." Diana asked, laying her head back down on the pillow.

Albert laughed, "Naw. Gotta work. But I wanna see them kids for Christmas. A'ight? But thank'ya for the pictures. We got all five kids on the wall! Momma loves'em. She got in'a fist fight at church de'fenden Jordan."

A smile came over Diana's face.

"How you doin girl?"

Diana opened her eyes, "Ok. I think."

"Ya know….it's be a lil over a year, I swear I still think he's here."

Tears burnt in Diana's eyes, "I know how you feel."

Albert was quiet for a moment, then he asked, "You seein anyone?"

"No," Diana whispered.

"How's Sanderson doin?"

"He's ok. He's over in the desert right now," Diana told him, rubbing Daniel's back when the infant moved.

"What the hell is he doin in the damn desert! Does he wanna get his ass shot? What the hell is his problem? He left yo ass with them chillin on yo own? I'll kick his skinny ass!"

Suddenly, Jordan lifted his head, he looked over at Diana. Diana reached over and ran a hand through his dark hair. Smoothing it back.

Jordan fell back on his pillow, sound asleep.

"I'm fine Albert," Diana lied.

She looked over the children, the children that completed her and helped her survive. She just wasn't sure where she would go from there.


	16. Chapter 16

It was almost morning when the phone rang again.

Thinking it was Albert, Diana rolled on her side, she grabbed the phone and muttered, "What do you want now?"

There was a pause, and then a voice came over the line, "Mrs. Gibson?"

Inside she froze.

It was the call she had gotten once before, the call she dreaded. Her throat dried and she was unable to even speak.

Again, the voice asked, "Mrs. Gibson?"

Hoarsely, terrified, she whispered, "Yes?"

The voice was firm, authoritive, almost cold. Diana crawled from bed as the man told her his rank, where he was and all that. Diana didn't want the kids to hear her or feel her if she began to cry. She fled out in the hall and put the phone back to her ear, "it was a successful surgery. The surgeon managed to stop the bleeding and he is being shipped to Germany for further treatment and evaluation. Since the Specialist has you as power of attorney and emergency contact, the Army will fly you to see him if you wish."

Immediately Diana spoke up, "Yes. How did it happen? Where was he shot?"

The voice paused, "Ma'am I can't tell you that."

Her temper flared, "I am not asking that! Where did the bullet enter the body? What type of round was it?"

"It was a hollow tipped 9mm. It entered the body from what I heard…through his shoulder, went through his collarbone, down through his left lung, and got lodged in his vest."

Diana's legs went out from underneath her, she collapsed on the floor. Knowing the damage a hollow tipped bullet left behind. The thought of how he had been shot, she began to cry.

The man on the other end of the line remained calm, "Ma'am. When do you want to go?"

Through her tears Diana asked, "Where is he?"

"He's on his way to Germany."

Diana ran a hand through her hair, alone in the dark hall. Unable to stop the tears.

"Ma'am," the voice asked.

"I'll take the first flight out," she told the man.

He then told her, "I'll reserve a seat for a morning flight between ten and twelve today?"

"Fine," Diana told him, then heard him hang up.

Alone in the hallway, she cried. Unable to stop herself. She sobbed as quietly as possible.

Then dialed eleven numbers on the phone.

After four rings a heavily accented southern voice came over the line. Bright and perky as always, Hoot's mother, "Hello baby."

At the sound of the familiar voice Diana broke down even more, knowing Momma Gibson had caller ID.

"Diana baby, what's wrong sweetheart?"

Through tears and hiccups Diana managed to tell her, "Sanderson got shot."

Momma Gibson's voice screeched, "_Oh My Lordy Jesus! Is he ok? Lord Have Mercy! Oh good Lordy chile!_"

Diana pulled her knees up under her chin, "I think so. Momma G, I don't know what to do. I can't take it anymore."

"Oh baby. You gotta be strong for those beautiful children. I tell you what. I am gonna fly on over, and stay with you. A'ight?"

With a sob, Diana nodded, "Ok. They're gonna fly me out to see him. I don't know how long he'll be in the hospital."

"Where they flyin him to baby?"

Diana told her the hospital base in Germany, through tears. She wiped her face repeatedly. It didn't help.

Momma Gibson was quiet for a moment, then she told Diana, "That's where you met my baby, Hoot."

Diana thought about it, then realized it was true. Which just made her sob even more and harder then before. Momma Gibson immediately regretted bringing that up, it took her a few minutes to calm Diana down. When she did she told Diana, "Now baby. Baby girl, listen to me! Are you listening?"

Miserably, Diana moaned, "Yes."

"Ok baby, my son married a strong woman. I know you have had it really really rough for the past few years, a'ight, but God wouldn't give you anythang you wouldn't be able to handle, ok baby?"

"Yes," Diana answered.

"Now. When you get off tha phone with me, call Jamie, A'ight? Have her take care'a them five angels. I'm gonna fly over. You have Jamie pick me up at the airport. A'ight? You don't worry bout me. I'll call Jamie later today, you pack yo stuff and go to Germany. Kiss them angels, tell'em what's wrong. Then go worry bout Sanderson. A'ight? When you two come home the house will be full'a food. The kids will be fine with Momma G. A'ight?"

"Yes," Diana agreed.


	17. Chapter 17

_Authors Note, Hello people! I am thinking this is the last chapter in the fic. So, enjoy!_

Sanderson woke up on his back, feeling numb.

Not numb cold.

Or emotionally cold.

But numb from painkillers.

There was a slight ache in his neck. Then he remembered why, he remembered going in a house to clear it. He remembered clearing the first room, then the second, then he and his men were getting shot at from above.

A sniper.

He remembered shooting back…but then there was a pain. Then he tasted blood, he coughed up blood, and he remembered thinking about his children, his wife, and Diana before he passed out.

After he took out the sniper, and cleared the house though.

Sanderson lifted his head, seeing there was a bandage on his side. He felt one on his neck.

He felt the IV in his wrist. He could hear his heart on a monitor that beeped. He knew he was in a hospital. When he looked around and saw he was in a nice single room, he knew he was in Germany.

Then, he spotted Diana asleep on the floor. On a stretcher that was down.

She was sound asleep in blue jeans and a simple black shirt.

Guilt filled him.

But his mind was made up, he sat up in bed.

Thanking God for the Morphine or whatever painkiller was in his body. Sanderson un-taped the IV from his wrist and pulled it out. He then looked for the other end of a wire that was connected to the heart monitor. When he found it on a shaved patch of his chest, he peeled it off his chest. Seeing glue left behind on his skin.

Then the machine began to buzz.

The noise woke Diana up. She sat up and was on her feet before she even knew where she was, she blinked when she saw Sanderson sitting up, holding the monitor in his hand.

Too tired to be annoyed, Diana walked over to him and snatched it from him. She glared at him. The expression told him everything that she was too tired to vocalize. She did ask, "Can you feel anything?"

Sanderson shook his head, "No. Diana."

Sleepily, she began to hook the heart monitor back up, "What?"

Sanderson found her eyes and told her, "I love you."

Diana narrowed her eyes, then told him, "That's the meds talking Sanderson. Now, lay down, before I smother you."

"No. Diana, I'm serious."

She held his gaze and saw he was serious, annoyed, she whined, "Sanderson. I am too tired."

He looked down at the stretcher, "You just woke up."

Diana threw the heart monitor down and turned the machine off. "That's not what I meant. I am tired of getting the three in the morning phone call. I am tired of knowing what you're doing, knowing you're willingly going into a fight. I am tired of being alone. I am tired of being pitied. But, most of all, I am tired of living in a different country several times a year. I am especially tired of all this being normal, Sanderson."

"I'll get a desk job. Or a training job. I'll get out of the field." Sanderson told her, seeing the toll of what she had said in her eyes. Seeing the complete shock in her eyes.

It was one thing Diana didn't want, "Sanderson. I don't want you to quit what you do because of me. You never told me to go back to work. You never told me what to do with my career. I don't want to be the reason behind you not being on active duty."

A small smile came over Sanderson's face, a tired smile, "Diana. I have been thinking a lot about it lately."

She stared at him. Tired. As she tried to figure out if he was serious, or just really drugged. But he continued, "It's not the same anymore. It hasn't been for a while…and now, I am going to either get a job that doesn't put me in the field, or leave when the rest of my time is up."

Diana knew he had eight months left before he either re-enlisted or was honorably discharged.

She sat on the side of his stretcher and looked down in his blue eyes, "Are you positive that is what you want? Will you be happy? Outside of the Army?"

Sanderson moved, to sit up, but Diana placed a hand gently on his chest , which kept him down. Sanderson stayed down, but he also told her, "I'll keep myself busy. I have a degree in criminology. If I am bored I can become a cop, or get a government job. I'll find a job."

Diana held his blue eyes, but didn't lift her hand from his chest. "I only have a year until my contract runs up. The only thing is…I don't have any family. Just Hoot's, I don't have a home back in the states."

That mildly surprised Sanderson, he had no desire to move anywhere near his mother. Anywhere south or west of the Mason Dixon line was good for him. So he told her, "Lets worry about today, ok? When it's time for my paperwork we'll decide then."

With a nod Diana agreed.

Sanderson then scooted over to share the small medical bed. Diana looked around at all the equipment, when she was positive she wouldn't hurt him, she climbed up onto the metal bed with thin mattress, which was actually a pad. She lay on her side, curling up against him. The warmth of another person beside another was something neither of them had felt in some time. Both of them relished the lack of space on the hospital bed, which pushed them closer together. She made sure she didn't touch his wound, so she pressed her hands against his side, and laid her head on the pillow. She would not let him move.

Diana softly kissed his cheek and told him, "Get some rest."


End file.
